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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph compares the GDP per capita, cost of a Toyota Camry and approximate length of time it takes for 1 citizen to purchase that mode of transport in eight Asian countries.

The graph compares the GDP per capita, cost of a Toyota Camry and approximate length of time it takes for 1 citizen to purchase that mode of transport in eight Asian countries.
#gdp #capita #cost #toyota #camry #length #time #citizen #purchase #mode #transport #eight #asian #countries
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The graph compares the GDP,
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
show examples
 of a Toyota Camry and
approximate
Correct article usage
the approximate
show examples
 length of time it takes for each citizen to buy that mode of vehicle in eight Asian states.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
car
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 is at
Correct pronoun usage
its peaks
show examples
peaks
Fix the agreement mistake
peak
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Singapore and the
income
Use synonyms
 of individuals
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
 higher as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 seven countries.
However
Linking Words
, in Vietnam, it took several
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
 to
pucharse
Correct your spelling
purchase
 a
Car
Use synonyms
. It is quite evident from the graph,
the
Correct word choice
that the
show examples
 Singapore
car
Use synonyms
price
Use synonyms
 is
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
 which is 126.245
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
USD,
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
income
Use synonyms
 of Singapore
people
Use synonyms
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
 high which is 55.182 and
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
 takes approximately 2
years
Use synonyms
 to purchase
a transport
Remove the article
transport
a means of transport
a mode of transport
show examples
.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the cost of
Use synonyms
car
Add an article
the car
a car
show examples
 in Malaysia is 41,302$ and the
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 is 3rd
quarter
Correct article usage
a quarter
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
price
Use synonyms
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is 10.538 and individuals
takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
show examples
 under 4
years
Use synonyms
 to buy a vehicle.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, the
price
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
car
Add an article
the car
a car
show examples
 in
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
 is
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
 which is 29.822.
Although
Linking Words
,the
income
Use synonyms
 of humans of china is 6,807 and they
takes
Change the verb form
take
show examples
 around 5
years
Use synonyms
 to
pucrchase
Correct your spelling
purchase
 a transport.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,the cost of
vehicle
Add an article
the vehicle
a vehicle
show examples
 in Vietnam is around 50$.
Besides
Linking Words
, the
income
Use synonyms
 of Vietnam
people
Use synonyms
 is lowest
that is
Linking Words
 1.910 and
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 of their takes 26,1
years
Use synonyms
 to buy a
Car
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by nidarif855 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, that is".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words car, price, income, people, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "compares" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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