You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter •say why he/she would not enjoy going to college •explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her •suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

#friend #advice #college #job #•say #•explain #idea #•suggest

Dear David, Hello Amal, I hope you are keeping well. I am writing to you to give some advice because I have recently received a letter from you.

Firstly

, I would not recommend to attend to the college in your area. We couldn'

find

Correct your spelling

any

show examples

international colleges.

moreover

, local student use their local language

therefore

it feels like alone and not possible to find friends.

additionally

, fees are more expensive. In Korea, the cost of living is very high students can'

survive and haven'

any jobs.

while

you are studying difficult to save many

also

. I suggest finding a suitable job for you.

Change the capitalization

show examples

think it would be a better choice for your future plans. I know you haven'

any work experience but

firstly

, a good idea to find a small job

such

as a waitress and retail kind of job.

then

you can build up your work experience step by step. if you are difficult to find it please inform me I help you soon as I can. I'm waiting for your reply and see you soon. Best of luck, Smith.

Submitted by dhanushkalakmal19 on Fri Jun 07 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

single idea per paragraph

Ensure each paragraph contains a single, clear idea. Combining too many ideas in one paragraph can confuse the reader.

complete response

Avoid overly general statements. Provide more detailed reasons and examples for your suggestions to strengthen your arguments.

suitable writing tone

The tone of the letter is friendly and suitable for a letter to a friend.

greeting and closing

You have included a proper greeting and closing, which makes the letter feel complete.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

181 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

theoretical nature
real-world experience
practical experience
professional network
financial independence
dynamic
on-the-job learning
creative industries
customer service
sectors
suitable

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
These days some people argue that food should be locally produced and consumed instead of transporting it from fileds to markets. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Today's, foods and daily productions faces challengaes. There is a belief that local out-puts should not be transport to other stores, as local consumers can use these by themselves. I strongly disagree with this statement, since it may have some long drawbacks and qunsequences.
4.5
band
Some people think that famous people's support towards International aid organisations draws attention to problems, while others think that celebrities make the problem less important.Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
In this contemporay era, the famous people are addressed the important issue around the world inorder to that issue get more attention. Some individuals believe that the renowed person are creating more pubic eye on towards some issue when they become an ambassdor, while others opine that these cleberities attention might be reduced the less significant towards the issue. This essay discuss these both views and I agree with a former opinion for the following paragraphs.
6
band
You wish to apply for a position with a company in your city. Write a letter to the manager of this company and include the following information: - your educational background - your work experience - other information that makes you an ideal candidate for the position
I'm writing this letter in regard to your job advertisement on LinkedIn for the Botanical Illustrator position.
6.5
band
Some think newspapers are the best method for reading the news while others think other media is better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Although, certain segments of society think that reading news from papers is more convenient for us. However, I agree with people who prefer media because accessing the news through media is easier and not dependent on most conditions.
<4
band
Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is believed by a group of people that growing children in a spirit of competition is benefical. Other individuals consider that there some upsides for relationship among people in co-operation. Even though competition is practical for some situations in life, from my perspective co-operation is vital.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

These days some people argue that food should be locally produced and consumed instead of transporting it from fileds to markets. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that famous people's support towards International aid organisations draws attention to problems, while others think that celebrities make the problem less important.Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

You wish to apply for a position with a company in your city. Write a letter to the manager of this company and include the following information: - your educational background - your work experience - other information that makes you an ideal candidate for the position

Some think newspapers are the best method for reading the news while others think other media is better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.