In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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There is a growing trend to become an employee in the company compared to pursuing a degree in college among Generation Z. In
this
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essay, I will explain both pros and cons
as well as
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my opinion on
this
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notion.
However
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, I believe the disadvantages exceed the advantages of
this
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issue.
To begin
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with, there are several benefits to being an employee.
Firstly
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, an individual gets real-life work experiences and many lectures do not offer
this
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activity since they only teach theoretical skills in the class.
This
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person
also
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obtained income which is very valuable knowledge to help them become more independent.
Besides
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that, young people will be more responsible for managing their own money
due to
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their recognizing the hard work that they put in from their full-time jobs.
On the other hand
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, it can create drawbacks.
For example
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, the majority of workers intend to achieve a higher position each year,
thus
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, it creates strong competition among them.
Consequently
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, the environment for creating new friends is unsuitable in the workplace.
In addition
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, the unhealthy culture of the company can lead to stress for young generations since they do not have friends who are willing to accompany them in hard times.
Then
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, if they decide to switch careers, it will be hard to find other opportunities
due to
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their not having equivalent degrees from the job requirement. In conclusion, I believe young people should balance between academic areas and professional experiences.
Therefore
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, they can leverage quality from the college by acquiring more friends and theoretical areas.
However
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, an individual can
also
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join an internship when they have free time to enhance their working experiences.
Submitted by firly on

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Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance the logical structure of your essay, consider using more varied conjunctions and transitional phrases to explicitly connect your paragraphs and ideas. This will help guide the reader more smoothly from one point to the next.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific examples or anecdotes that can help illustrate your points. Personal or familiar experiences can make your essay more persuasive and relatable.
Task Achievement
Try to elaborate more on each point with additional details or explanations, ensuring that your ideas are fully developed and comprehensive.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have structured your essay logically, presenting both the advantages and disadvantages before giving your opinion.
Task Achievement
You provide a balanced view of both sides of the argument, which demonstrates an understanding of the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-based training
  • enrol
  • university
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • practical skills
  • experience
  • workforce
  • employment
  • earnings
  • opportunities
  • further education
  • theoretical knowledge
  • career options
  • exploitation
  • balance
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