Some people say that subjects like arts, music, drama and creative writing are more beneficial to children and therefore they need more of these subjects to be included in the timetable. Do you agree or disagree?

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There is no denying the fact that education is a significant factor in improving our society.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that
such
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as art, music, drama and creative writing are more beneficial to children and
therefore
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should have more time allocated for these studies in the timetable, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it,In my opinion, I consider that all
subjects
Use synonyms
are equally essential.
To begin
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with, schools must ensure that they teach all programs to children to improve their various skills.
In other words
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, they need to enhance their skills in accounting, reading and exploring things through different types of educational programs
such
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as math, science and technology.
In addition
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, they will be able to make good choices and be the best members of our communities.
For example
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, a study conducted in the UK shows that all
subjects
Use synonyms
play a crucial role in shaping students’ personalities. Another point to consider, they will be able to recognize their passions, which will lead them to their future jobs.It is
also
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possible to say that all successful people in diverse fields explore their preferred
subjects
Use synonyms
when they are young.
Moreover
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, they will be able to enhance their talent in various fields creating solutions that help their countries.
For instance
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, during the COVID-19 pandemic, some
together
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apply
show examples
scientists from different countries collaborate
together
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apply
show examples
to innovate a treatment for
this
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virus. ‏In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that we should apple focus on teaching the new generation all types of
subjects
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mnm_234 on

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task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly states whether you agree or disagree with the statement.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the linkage between paragraphs for smoother transitions and clarity.
task achievement
Provide specific examples that are directly related to the argument you are presenting.
task achievement
The essay provides a balanced view by acknowledging both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
You have included a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader.
coherence cohesion
The essay touches on how various subjects contribute to a child's overall development.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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