An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own pourer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

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In the past few years, numerous people, even including teachers and physicians migrated abroad for the sake of their betterment and personal development. Undoubtedly, there must be a lot of reasons for moving to other countries, and we will discuss some solutions to mitigate the migration. The first and foremost reason behind going to foreign is the the unemployment rate in our area, which does not let the talented once to have an option to work in their own city. Apart from that, other issues
such
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as nepotism and bribes
also
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push the professionals to leave their own homes because they want to recruit their own kiths and kin which reflects to keep the developing countries developing only not the developed ones. in order to get rid of
this
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problem, employers must hire people on the basis of their qualifications and experiences rather than references only. Not only
this
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, some strict actions should be taken by the government to help deserving candidates
to
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apply
show examples
join the positions
according to
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their studies and other factors
such
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as their practice and placements.
For instance
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, there was a survey in Istanbul that in 2019, more than 60% of the population moved abroad for their work, but the authorities had to bring those people back.
To sum up
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, Mass would prefer those areas to work where they would get paid more.
However
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,
according to
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my page, the issues can be fixed by implementing some restrictive rules.
Submitted by komalbansal51670 on

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task achievement
Ensure a consistent use of vocabulary, particularly industry-specific terms like 'migration' and 'professionals.' This will enhance your task achievement and the clarity of your response.
task achievement
Develop additional, concrete examples to support your main points. Use specific data or more detailed personal or hypothetical examples to illustrate your arguments, making the essay more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Consider strengthening transitions between paragraphs. Using transitional words and phrases can improve the logical flow, guiding the reader smoothly from one point to another.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases or sentence structures. Diversifying your language will improve readability and maintain the reader's interest.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, setting up and summarizing your arguments effectively. This structure is crucial for readability and ensuring the essay remains focused on the task.
task achievement
The essay discusses relevant issues like unemployment and nepotism, showing a strong understanding of the topic's complexity.
task achievement
You included a specific example (the Istanbul survey), which helps to ground your arguments and demonstrate an understanding of real-world implications.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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