IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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These days, some
people
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 hold the view that
people
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 who
career
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have careers
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 in
doctores
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doctorate
engineer
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engineering
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 and more should be required to
work
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 in the country where they learned knowledge. But others support that
people
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 can
work
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 abroad.
This
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 topic is popular and common in the world. In my opinion, I
aggre
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agree
 with the latter one. I believe that
people
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 choosing the
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work place
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workplace
show examples
 where they want to stay
is
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in
show examples
 their freedom. On the one hand,
people
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 working abroad can improve themselves. Through working in other countries,
people
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 can learn different cultures and habits, it is a good way to open minds. Meanwhile,
people
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work
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 with different
people
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 who come from different backgrounds, it is a good method that
improve
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improves
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their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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all kinds of skills,
for example
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, problem-solving skills, teamwork ability, communication skills and more.
People
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 will become more and more self-confident.
On the other hand
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, if
people
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work
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 in their own nation, they do not adjust to a new environment. In
this
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 station,
people
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 can improve their
work
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 efficiency.
People
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 can finish more assisments and create more value
in
Change preposition
at
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 the same time. It can help
people
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 save more time. In my opinion,
people
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 should challenge
difficulties
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the difficulties
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 of working abroad, especially young
people
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. Ars far as we all know, young
people
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 are the future of our nation. The youth increasingly want to challenge difficulties, the nation is younger. In conclusion,
people
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 should
work
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 in other countries, it is a good action to improve them.When they learn success one day, they should go back home to be grateful for the country that supported them

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support the points made.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical flow between paragraphs for better coherence.
task achievement
Clarify some of your arguments with more detailed explanations.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion present.
task achievement
Addresses both views of the topic.
task achievement
Good understanding of the topic is evident.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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