More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

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The extinction of wild animals has been a critical issue in recent years. Many species of them are on the verge of destruction. Human activities can cause

this

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problem,

for instance

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, damaging their habitats. Fortunately, there are various measures to overcome these issues as the solutions. There are many reasons why human activities can ruin the population of untamed carnivores.

Firstly

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, the development of buildings by developers needs a large ground which is obtained by deforestation. The situation certainly harms the habitation of wildlife, so that they lose their places.

Secondly

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, the other people's occupation is hunting the unpopulated creatures, with the purpose of making luxury things with their skin. Several communities sell their goods made from animals' skin,

such

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as bags, wallets, jackets, and blankets.

Moreover

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, all of the conditions are to increase economic growth without thinking about the safety of the wildlife. To solve

this

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problem, the government should strictly control the industry by making laws to help the loss of the uncultivated populations.

For example

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, creating licensing regulations to control deforestation and untamed hunting. First of all, the state institution which gives the allowance to developers has to measure the advantages and disadvantages of the development measuring the negative environmental impacts, especially for the endangered population. Another way is to stop hunting wild creatures, unallowable hunting in certain regions

according to

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regulations.

Moreover

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, the country has to implement a punishment for those who break the rules. In conclusion, a state should improve their limitations and regulations to reduce the destruction of undomesticated carnivores.

imeldarosari6Wed Jan 15 2025

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examples

Provide more specific examples to support your points, such as mentioning specific animal species that are endangered.

clarity

Clarify some ideas to make the argument clearer, such as why human activities like building development affect wildlife.

language

Improve the use of specific language and terminology related to the topic, such as 'deforestation' accurately rather than 'damaging habitats.'

task

The essay maintains a clear focus on the topic and addresses both the causes and solutions to the problem.

structure

The introduction and conclusion are present and effectively open and close the discussion.

cohesion

The essay logically progresses from the problem to the solution with transitional phrases like 'fortunately' and 'moreover.'

8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support you r answer.

With growing number of populations in cities, many people are living in small homes that don't have outdoor spaces. Is this a positive or negative development.

In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Many people today find that the cost of attaining a University-level education is extremely high for the students and their families. What are the causes of this situation, and how can governments, Universities and the students themselves overcome the problem?