IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The increase frequency of satellite launches and space debris is becoming a threat to the earth. What are the main causes? What measures can be taken to address this?

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In our modern
society
Add a comma
society,
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 we are using
satellite
Fix the agreement mistake
satellites
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 more than we used to in past. Because of
this
Linking Words
 nowadays we are facing
such
Linking Words
 a threat
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 debris
are covered
Wrong verb form
covering
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 our earth's atmosphere more and more day by day. In our world there
is
Change the verb form
are
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lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of
countries
Use synonyms
 who
is
Change the verb form
are
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 racing with each other
for exploring
Change preposition
to explore
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space
Use synonyms
 first.
For example
Linking Words
 invisible race between China and
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 in cosmic
battle
Fix the agreement mistake
battles
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 trying to overcome each other and invent news about
space
Use synonyms
 before
than
Change preposition
apply
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each other.
As a
Linking Words
result
Add a comma
result,
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 they sent several
satellities
Correct your spelling
satellites
 and other vehicles to the orbit of the earth monthly. Because of
such
Linking Words
 a kind of competition between enormous
Use synonyms
countries
Add a comma
countries,
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 we
are
Verb problem
use
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 so many
used
Correct word choice
apply
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parts of rockets which is
threat
Add an article
a threat
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 to our safety. To decrease the amount
rubbish
Change preposition
of rubbish
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 in orbit it would be more useful to create
international
Correct article usage
an international
show examples
space
Use synonyms
 exploration
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 and share all news with each other and stop competition.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
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 if we combine our resources to discover
space
Use synonyms
 with all
countries
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 we have to send
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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space
Use synonyms
less
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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satellites.
As a
Linking Words
consequence
Add a comma
consequence,
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 we can harm the
earth's
Capitalize word
Earth's
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 atmosphere less
while
Linking Words
 continuing
learning
Change the verb form
to learn
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 the
space
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, to save our planet from
circle
Add an article
the circle
a circle
show examples
 of debris around
of
Change preposition
apply
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its atmosphere. We should support international communication with other
countries
Use synonyms
 and do all the research together.

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task achievement
Ensure that all main points are backed up with specific examples or evidence.
task achievement
Develop each idea more fully to provide a more comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
Improve the clarity of ideas by organizing paragraphs around single central themes.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words more effectively to guide readers through the argument.
introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a clear effort to introduce the topic and conclude with suggestions.
task achievement
The attempt to address both causes and solutions to the problem is evident.
task achievement
The discussion about international collaboration as a solution is a relevant and thoughtful point.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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