Many people today prefer to shop online rather than visiting physical stores. What are the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping for individuals and society?

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our contemporary world, many consumers have been purchasing online increasingly. Some
people
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think that online shopping has brought many benefits,
while
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others argue that it has drawbacks.
This
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essay will explore the upsides and downsides of online shopping. On the one hand, shopping online has significantly facilitated the way we purchase positively.
For example
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, shopping online allows customers to do their shopping all day, benefiting busy
people
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to shop whenever they want. Another advantage of shopping is
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the availibility
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availibility
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availability
of a wide
rang
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range
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of goods. To illustrate, many consumers can purchase multiple products, especially products that do not
occur
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exist
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in their country.
Moreover
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, online shopping can significantly boost the economy of society by increasing the income
resourses
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resources
of the country.
On the other hand
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, online shopping could mislead customers by providing them with unrealistic feedback to attract
people
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to buy their products
as well as
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providing them
poor
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with poor
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quality of goods.
In addition
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, shopping online can negatively harm local stores which leads to increasing losses of jobs.
For example
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, several stores cut down their workers
due to
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decreasing in purchasing.
Finally
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, some online shopping platforms offer dangerous items
such
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as weapons and medicines which could harm
people
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's health negatively in conclusion, shopping online has significantly made
the
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apply
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shopping easier for purchasers by unlimited goods and time
as well as
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improving the economy of the community.
However
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, it could damage both individuals and society alike
through
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by
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providing
the
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apply
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unrealistic feedback, increasing unemployment,
offering
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and offering
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dangerous items. If governments increase awareness campaigns about the use of shopping online appropriately, it will reduce the negative side of shopping online.
Submitted by bkalmutairi01 on

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task achievement
To enhance your essay further, consider elaborating on the examples you provide. For instance, how precisely does online shopping 'significantly boost the economy'? Adding specifics can make your arguments more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Work on providing a clearer logical flow between the positive and negative points discussed. Despite having an introduction and a conclusion, the transition between these sections could be smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Some grammatical errors and awkward phrasings were present (e.g., 'boost the economy of society','many consumers can purchase multiple products'), though they don't significantly obstruct understanding. Proofreading for language accuracy could be helpful.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion clearly frame the essay and provide a good overview of the points you will cover.
task achievement
You effectively present both the positives and negatives of online shopping, which shows balanced consideration of the topic.
task achievement
The essay generally stays focused on the topic, addressing the advantages and disadvantages relevantly.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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