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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart presents the medium increase of home production in rich states that have adapted an internatinoal approach to business and countries that have not.

The bar chart presents the medium increase of home production in rich states that have adapted an internatinoal approach to business and countries that have not.
#bar #medium #home #production #states #approach #business #countries
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The bar chart presents the medium
increase
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
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 home production in rich
states
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 that have
adapted
Correct your spelling
adopted
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 an
internatinoal
Correct your spelling
international
 approach to business and
countries
Use synonyms
 that have not.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that a decline in the annual
growth
Use synonyms
 of the Gross Domestic Product of rich
states
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 and
Use synonyms
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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 in the
per
Add a hyphen
per-year
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year
Use synonyms
growth
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 of the Gross Domestic Product of Globalisers.
According to
Linking Words
 the bar
chart
Add a comma
chart,
show examples
 the
growth
Use synonyms
 of
Wealth
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wealthy
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countries
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 was almost 5%
to
Change preposition
apply
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per
year
Use synonyms
 and the
increase
Use synonyms
 of
Non-Globalisers
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 was above 2%.{not up to 2.5%}, as for business
states
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theirs
Correct the word
their
show examples
growth
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 was almost 1.5% a
year
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 in the 1960s. In
1970s
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the 1970s
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, The
GDP
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growth
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 of rich
states
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was remained
Change to the active voice
remained
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to
Change preposition
at
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 almost 3%
to
Change preposition
apply
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annual
Change the word
annually
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 and the per
year
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increase
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 of the Globalisers
to reach
Change the verb form
reached
show examples
 almost 3% and their
growth
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 was the same as that of rich
countries
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. The annual
growth
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 of
Non-Globalisers
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 was higher than 3%. In
1980s
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the 1980s
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, the annual
growth
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 of the
Non-Globalisers
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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was not even 1% and
GDP
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 decreased by 2% compared to
last
Linking Words
years
Change noun form
year's
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.
Use synonyms
GDP
Correct article usage
The GDP
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 of Wealth
states
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 decreased again and it was slightly above 2%.
GDP
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 the
growth
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 of Business
states
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 grew again and exceeded 3%. In
1990s
Change the article
the 1990s
show examples
,
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GDP
Correct article usage
the GDP
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increase
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 of the rich
states
Use synonyms
 fell again and was 2%. Home Production of
Non-Globalisers
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 grew back and it was almost 1.5%. The greatest
growth
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 of Home Production was observed in the Globalizing
countries
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 and their
growth
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 was almost 5% (4.9%) in
1990s
Change the article
the 1990s
show examples
.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words increase, states, countries, growth, year, non-globalisers, gdp with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "presents" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 11 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 6 times.
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