In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? 1-1 Zhaina

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Several years ago, there were some
students
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who tended to
study
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in their native countries and did a university degree there.
However
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, many years later they have the majority of opportunities to
study
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in other nations. So, there are some advantages like you will get
experience
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from studying there and be more knowledgeable,
while
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there are
also
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disadvantages
such
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as suffering from
language
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barrier and lack of financial stability. The main advantage of studying abroad is
experience
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and knowledge that
students
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can improve their skills and abilities in other areas.
This
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enables them to practice their skills to achieve goals, which is much more useful than studying in their hometown universities.
For example
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, Skill Development,
According to
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a survey by the Institute for the International Education of
Students
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(IES), 90% of
students
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who studied abroad reported that the
experience
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had a lasting impact on their career trajectory. Despite
this
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, I believe that
this
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encourages
students
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to be more
self-activity
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self-active
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and self-adapting.
However
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, there are some disadvantages of studying far away from
the
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their
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hometown,
such
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as
language
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barriers, money strain and stress, which can lead them to be less productive and harder to naturalize.
For instance
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, Financial strain or stability ,
according to
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the HSBC
study
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on the cost of studying abroad, 42% of
students
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report financial
difficulties
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as a major challenge
due to
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high tuition fees, living expenses, and travel costs and the most
importantly
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important
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problem
are
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is
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language
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Barriers Around 35% of international
students
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experience
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difficulties
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with
language
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, which affects their academic performance and social life,
according to
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the Institute of International Education (IIE). I believe that
this
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makes pupils who
study
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in a foreign university or nation thoroughly understand. In conclusion,
although
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study
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studying
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in another country can help them to develop and achieve their goals, they can
also
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be face to face with some problems which can lead them into
difficulties
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such
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as lack of
language
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skills or
difficulties
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with finances.

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coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing the logical flow between ideas. Sometimes, ideas are presented abruptly without clear transitions. Using linking words like 'furthermore', 'in addition', and 'however' can improve this.
task achievement
Try to develop each point with a bit more depth. For instance, you could provide more explanation on how the experiences abroad lead to skill development.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea that is thoroughly explored. Currently, some paragraphs touch on multiple ideas at once, which can dilute the main point.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is clear and sets up the essay topic well, explaining the shift in education trends over time.
task achievement
The essay contains specific examples and statistics, which strengthen your points and show you can support your arguments with evidence.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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