The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same period.

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same period.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table illustrates the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of
Museum's
Change noun form
Museum
show examples
visitors
Use synonyms
during the year before and after the refurbishment. The charts
demonstrates
Change the verb form
demonstrate
show examples
the surveys result which
about
Add a missing verb
are about
show examples
the
Use synonyms
visitors
Change noun form
visitor's
visitors'
show examples
satisfication
Correct your spelling
satisfaction
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
their
visiting
Replace the word
visit
show examples
, during these years.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from the table and chart is that the
number
Use synonyms
of
visitor
Change to a plural noun
visitors
show examples
has increased after the refurbishment. There
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
vary
Replace the word
various
show examples
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
the museum
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
in the year before refurbishment,
while
Linking Words
the
majorety
Correct your spelling
majority
of people were satisfied after that. Looking at the survey details, in the period before redecoration, the
number
Use synonyms
of
visitors
Use synonyms
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
74,000 30% of
theim
Correct your spelling
them
were happy which
acounted
Correct your spelling
accounted
for 30% of the survey outcomes .
This
Linking Words
as
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
almost near who dissatisfied, which were 40%. Only 15% of
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
show examples
were very satisfied at 15%. Followed
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
10% of very dissatisfied
visitors
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, only 5% of people did not
respone
Correct your spelling
respond
response
. Moving to the period during the year after enhancements, the
number
Use synonyms
of
visitor
Change to a plural noun
visitors
show examples
has
significant
Change the adjective
significantly
show examples
increased to reach 92,000
visitors
Use synonyms
. the result of
dissatisfied
Correct article usage
the dissatisfied
show examples
option showed a noticeable decline
alomst
Correct your spelling
almost
the half, which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
15%. There
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
increase
Add an article
an increase
the increase
show examples
in
Use synonyms
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of satisfied and very satisfied
visitors
Use synonyms
at 40% and 35%, respectively. the percentage of
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
very
Add a missing verb
are very
show examples
dissatisfied has decreased to 5%. The
number
Use synonyms
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals who
were
Verb problem
did
show examples
not respond
remainded
Correct your spelling
remained
the same at 5%.
Submitted by Hanan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, number with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "numbers of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 6 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • refurbishment
  • visitor satisfaction
  • survey results
  • exhibits
  • visitor experience
  • marketing strategies
  • dissatisfaction
  • enhancements
  • improvements
  • visitor perception
What to do next:
Look at other essays: