IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In addition to academic subjects at school, schools also should cover practical skills such as car repairing and gardening. do you agree or disagree with that statement?

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Practical
skills
Use synonyms
 like cooking and gardening should be
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
same
Add an article
the same
show examples
 level as important as academic
subjects
Use synonyms
. I partially agree that academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 are vital for
students
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 who continue their study,
however
Linking Words
 practical
skills
Use synonyms
 who start working immediately after school. Today many schools cover
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
 academic
subjects
Use synonyms
 which have some benefits for
Use synonyms
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, academic
skills
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 help them to improve
mentality
Correct pronoun usage
their mentality
show examples
 and would be helpful in their future jobs. Because many fields cover academic
subjects
Use synonyms
,
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
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example, accountants
aor
Correct your spelling
or
are
 others who work in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial or
economical
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economic
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 spheres need mathematics to calculate cash flows, bonds, stocks and so on.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there are other
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
 of the coin. It's cool
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 your children.Practical
skills
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also
Linking Words
, they seem to be in
same
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the same
show examples
 relationship with all
students
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. Because there are some
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
 of
students
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 who don't want to continue their
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
.They just would like to work and practical
skills
Use synonyms
 are very good for them to find money easily.
For example
Linking Words
, if
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 don't have any practical courses,
students
Use synonyms
 who desire to be a chief or mechanic have to go extra courses,
Linking Words
also
Correct pronoun usage
which also
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will cause
Wrong verb form
causes
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to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
bad attendance and bad marks in school. In conclusion, in some circumstances, teaching more
academics
Change the noun form
academic
show examples
subjects
Use synonyms
 than practical ones might cause discrimination among
students
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
 why I partially believe
subjects
Use synonyms
 should be
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
same
Change the article
the same
show examples
 magnitude.

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introduction conclusion present
Provide a clearer thesis statement in the introduction that outlines your main arguments.
supported main points
Expand on the examples given, such as explaining why practical skills might lead to better attendance and marks.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific examples to support your arguments, instead of general statements.
clear comprehensive ideas
Proofread for language mistakes, such as subject-verb agreement and word choice.
task achievement
The essay presents a thoughtful balance between academic subjects and practical skills.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion clearly outline the central argument.
logical structure
Ideas are linked logically, and the essay follows a clear structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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