Many young children have unsupervised access to the Internet and are using the Internet to socialise with others. This has can lead to a number of dangerous situations which can be threatening for childrean. Discuss problems and solution.

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Nowadays
growing
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a growing
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number of
internet based
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internet-based
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soical
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social
platforms are being used by children to connect with their peers and meet new friends. Despite some benefits, it can harm young individuals in many ways. So, I believe imminent interventions are needed regarding
this
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issue
inorder
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in order
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to save
this
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generation.
Virtual
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The virtual
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world
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has specific characteristics which can be dangerous for inexperienced
youngesters
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youngsters
. As information in social media is mostly unsupervised
they
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it
show examples
can be false and harmful.
Hence
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, children who use
this
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information may be harmed because of them.
Consequently
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, many relationships in
this
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world
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are corrupted and based on unrealities.
For instance
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, as many connections on platforms like
instagram
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Instagram
show examples
and
facebook
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Facebook
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are only shaped based on personal
profile's
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profile
show examples
details, they can mislead
naieve
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naive
kids and lead to toxic relationships.
Additionally
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, watching
manipulated
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a manipulated
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version
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versions
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of
life
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the life
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of others online may cause psychological problems for
the
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apply
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liable and
sensetive
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sensitive
teenagers. One
such
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example is
untrue
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the untrue
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luxourious
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luxurious
lifestyle of influencers on social applications which can make their followers think they are losers which in turn could result in low
selfsteem
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self-esteem
. Frequent exposures to these
riskfactors
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risk factors
may ruin
mental
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the mental
show examples
stability of any individual
specially
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especially
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little ones.
As these
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These
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generation which many
called
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call
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them
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the
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Z generation are future adults
which
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who
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should be psychologically healthy to keep society
move
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moving
show examples
forward. So, establishments should intervene emergently to prevent more
damages
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damage
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. In my
opinnion
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opinion
, any applications which
is
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are
show examples
used by under-aged individuals must be
accesible
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accessible
by
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to
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parents.
Furtheremore
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Furthermore
, authorities should
continousely
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continuously
monitor
children
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children's
show examples
behaviours online
while
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secure
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securing
show examples
their privacy.
Forexample
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For example
, keywords
such
Linking Words
as drug or adultery need to
be investigate
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be investigated
show examples
in these spaces.
Lastly
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,
student
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students
show examples
should be taught at schools how to behave in these
atmoshphere
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atmospheres
. What is more, it must be an obligatory course for
any one
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anyone
show examples
at
elementary
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the elementary
an elementary
show examples
level to be taken. In conclusion, It seems it is not wise to leave our
suseptible
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susceptible
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
alone and unwatched in a
world
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which might endanger their mental status and social communications.
Goverment
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Government
, parents and indeed the real subjects meaning young generations should be prepared
to
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for
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all
virtual
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the virtual
show examples
world
Use synonyms
's risks which can be detrimental to the foundation of our societies.

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coherence cohesion
Try to improve the coherence by using clearer topic sentences and transitions between ideas. This will make the essay flow more logically.
task achievement
Clarify the ideas in each paragraph for better comprehensibility. Sometimes your arguments are unclear or lack depth.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your main points. This will enhance the relevance of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion that present the main topic and wrap up the ideas well.
task achievement
You’ve identified key problems related to children using social media and suggested potential solutions.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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