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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical apliances and amount of time spent doing in households in one country between 1920 and 2019. Summarises the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical apliances and amount of time spent doing in households in one country between 1920 and 2019. Summarises the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
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The given graphs compare the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of families with home appliances and how many hours they spend doing chores every week during the period from 1920 to 2019 .
Overall
Linking Words
, refrigerators are the most used devices throughout the period,
while
Linking Words
 washing machines
the
Add a missing verb
are the
show examples
 least
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 item.
In addition
Linking Words
, by 2019 the number of
hour
Change to a plural noun
hours
show examples
 spent
to do
Change the verb form
doing
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 housework decreased extremely.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 refrigerators started at zero in 1920 and skyrocketed
at
Change preposition
to
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 100% by 1980,
then
Linking Words
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 went constantly at the same percentage until finish the study.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
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 represented a
similiar
Correct your spelling
similar
 trend
as
Change preposition
to
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 refrigerators, as it began at 30% and achieved
the
Correct article usage
apply
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100%
until
Change preposition
by
show examples
 2000.
In contrast
Linking Words
, washing machines remained with a stable elevation since it initiated at 40%, reached a high at 70% and in 1960
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
finally
Linking Words
 experienced a slight increase of almost 5%. In the second line graph, it can be seen that households dedicated many
hour
Change to a plural noun
hours
show examples
 per week to domestic chores; 50 hours. Around 1980 these decreased in an extraordinary manner to
finally
Linking Words
ends
Correct subject-verb agreement
end
show examples
 at 10 percent.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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