IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think that it is better to other countries for greater work and life opportunities. Others argue that it is best to stay in their home country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 different insights between
people
Use synonyms
 and some of them think the other places and nations
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 better for working and living opportunities
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others believe
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
 in their
home
Use synonyms
 country is
wiseable
Correct article usage
a wiseable
show examples
 choice.
actually
Add a comma
actually,
show examples
 I agree with the idea of searching for opportunities in the whole universe. The
people
Use synonyms
 that see is
best
Add an article
the best
show examples
 choice is going around the world and living abroad they believe
this
Linking Words
 will
experment
Correct your spelling
experience
 for
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
 and
for example
Linking Words
, like they will be meeting
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new
people
Use synonyms
 and see other cultures and try
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different works
inviroments
Correct your spelling
environments
environment
also
Linking Words
 could be
this
Linking Words
 place is serving them better than their
home
Use synonyms
 country and give them what they can not find in it. and I
also
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 opinion
is matching
Wrong verb form
matches
show examples
 mine and I believe the same way and should
humand
Correct your spelling
humans
human
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
 earth go and try everything they can do.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
 did not agree with
because
Correct pronoun usage
this because
show examples
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 feeling of need from their
home
Use synonyms
 and
also
Linking Words
 the strict obligations to their spot, they
also
Linking Words
 think if they go to another world country they feel they betrayed the place they
grow
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
 up in and they could give their
home
Use synonyms
 like he was

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coherence cohesion
To strengthen this essay, consider starting with a clearer and more succinct introduction that clearly outlines both perspectives and your own position. A strong conclusion to summarize the main points and reinforce your opinion is also necessary.
coherence cohesion
Structure your arguments more logically by having distinct paragraphs for each viewpoint and supporting each point with specific examples. This will make your ideas clearer and more persuasive.
task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting details for better task response. You can also include examples to support your ideas effectively.
coherence cohesion
The introduction presents both sides of the argument, offering a broad understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your opinion is clear and is integrated into the discussion of both perspectives, showing that you have a balanced view.
task achievement
You attempt to provide supporting ideas for both sides, which indicates understanding of the different perspectives.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • multinational companies
  • standard of living
  • personal growth
  • broader perspective
  • support system
  • social isolation
  • discrimination
  • healthcare
  • education
  • social services
  • enriching
  • fulfilling
  • impactful
  • career opportunities
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