Many countries have compulsory military service for young men after they leave school. It would be a good idea for all countries to adopt this system for men, and possibly for women too. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

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With multiple wars happening all around the world, the recruitment of people to enter the army has become a highly debated topic. Some individuals argue that serving in the military should be an obligation for both men and women,
while
others refuse
this
idea. In
this
essay, I will specify the reasons why I do not agree with compulsory military service. It is unarguable that not everyone is healthy enough to become a soldier. Even if the individual is physically athletic, the mental state of a person might not be sufficiently strong to cope with war scenarios. Forcing
this
could lead to depression, anxiety, post-traumatic disorder and eventually even suicide. The USA,
for example
, faces a very large group of soldiers in treatment for psychiatric conditions nowadays.
This
leads to higher health-care costs, less working force and a possibly lower national development rate.
Secondly
, compulsory feminine work could have even worse results. Depending on how long they must work in the armed forces, recruiting women after school age could lead them to postpone pregnancies which might impact massively birth rates. In the long term, the population of the country could shrink, which is exactly the opposite of what the military service aims for: protecting the nation and its growth.
To conclude
, I believe that governments should not impose on their population to become a part of the armed forces since
this
could harm its population in an irreparable way. In order to establish a competent army, governments should offer good salaries and protection to the ones who decide to serve their country.
Submitted by lurh on

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task achievement
Consider expanding on the reasons against compulsory military service with more varied examples or perspectives to cover different cultural or societal contexts.
coherence cohesion
Some paragraphs could be more explicitly connected with linking phrases to improve flow between arguments.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear argument against compulsory military service and supports it with relevant examples, such as the psychological impact on soldiers and effects on birth rates.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly states the main point of the essay and the conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments presented.
task achievement
The writer successfully uses examples from a real-world context to reinforce the main points, such as referencing mental health issues among soldiers in the USA.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Compulsory
  • Military service
  • Conscription
  • Patriotism
  • National security
  • Social equality
  • Discipline
  • Physical fitness
  • Life skills
  • Job training
  • Infringement
  • Conscripts
  • Gender equality
  • Mandatory
  • Economy
  • Education system
  • Labor market
  • Civil service
  • Alternative forms
  • Balanced view
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