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Writing Samples
Band 7

Every day, animals are becoming extinct throughout the world. What do you think the cause of this? What solution/measures can you suggest to deal with this

#animals #world #measures
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Species of
animals
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 are facing
extinction
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 across the globe. I do agree that there are some reasons and some practical solutions are going to be revealed in
this
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 essay. The destruction of natural habitats and pollution of ecosystems are two important reasons that have led
animals
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 to
extinction
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. As human activities invade vital environments, many
animals
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 find themselves without shelter. Replacing forests with factories or houses destroys animal habitats, forcing them to relocate.
This
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 relocation may make them struggle to adapt.
Additionally
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, pollutants contaminate the air and water, putting
animals
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 in danger. Pollutants produced by industries and homes can accumulate in
animals
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' bodies and invade their organs, particularly the respiratory systems.
In addition
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, a substantial decline in available
food
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 sources can impact
extinction
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 rates worldwide. When humans utilize certain
food
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 resources or alter environments to make them safer for themselves, it can lead to a shortage of
food
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 supplies, putting animal populations at risk of losing their lives. There are some solutions for the mentioned reasons of animal
extinction
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. First and foremost, governments around the world need to limit environmental destruction caused by factories and industries. They should recognize the importance of forests and oceans and allocate funds for their protection and
food
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 supply preparation for
animals
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.
Next,
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it is crucial for each person to understand the significant role that animal protection plays in ensuring a healthier world for future generations. By waste recycling and reducing waste production, individuals contribute to the preservation of environmental health and a balanced ecosystem.
This
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 awareness can play a crucial role in saving
animals
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 and protecting the environment. In conclusion,
animals
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 are facing
extinction
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, which can be considered a disaster. The solutions mentioned in
this
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 essay can help to reduce the rate of
this
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extinction
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.
Submitted by nazaninlotfi93150 on

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task response
To achieve a higher score in Task Response, include more specific examples and data to support your arguments, which will make your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly transitions to the next, reinforcing logical flow and enhancing the reader's understanding.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, providing a clear stance and summary of the essay.
task response
The essay demonstrates a good understanding of the causes and solutions related to animal extinction.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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