IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many countries have the same shops and products. Some consider it a positive development, whereas others consider it negative. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

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Opinions differ regarding whether or not it is a positive influence that there are similar markets and
goods
Use synonyms
 in many countries.
While
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 critics insist that having the same
shops
Use synonyms
 and
goods
Use synonyms
 in many nations is a negative development, I personally strongly disagree with
this
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 assertion since
people
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 and the government
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
marits
Correct your spelling
merits
markets
 from
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 markets and
shops
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, there is
major
Add an article
a major
the major
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 reason why having
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
shops
Use synonyms
 and
products
Use synonyms
 has a negative effect on economic growth.
Firstly
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, one country that has low sales figures is damaged economic development because of
expending
Correct your spelling
expanding
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 supply. To explain,
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
same
Correct your spelling
some
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products
Use synonyms
 are purchased cheaper in one
coutry
Correct your spelling
country
 than others because prices depend on which
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
 and
therefore
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, many
people
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 buy the
goods
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 cheaper in countries that sell affordable.
Therefore
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, supply might decrease with higher prices in nations
that
Correct word choice
where
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people
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 have to buy a large number of money, which
meanns
Correct your spelling
means
 that businesses should spend a large portion of their budget on keeping
goods
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. In the long run, their economic situation is significantly damaged.
On the other hand
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, I believe that
people
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 can have profits by having
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
products
Use synonyms
 and markets. First and foremost, when individuals travel overseas, they can spend cheaper prices on
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
products
Use synonyms
.
For example
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,
Uniqulo
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Uniqlo
 in Japan is more affordable than
Korea
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in Korea
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 because
traveller
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travellers
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 do not need to pay tax revenue when buying less than 20
dollers
Correct your spelling
dollars
.
For
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this
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 reason, individuals can be
offer
Wrong verb form
offered
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 tax
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 when they buy
other
Change preposition
from other
show examples
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
. In conclusion,
although
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 it is
underniable
Correct your spelling
undeniable
 that by having
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
products
Use synonyms
 and
shops
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, economic development can
be drop
Change the verb form
be dropped
show examples
,
it is clear that
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Change preposition
from in
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in
Correct your spelling
an
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individuals'
Change noun form
individual's
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 perspective, it plays a positive role in the
advantag
Correct your spelling
advantage
 of
tax free
Add a hyphen
tax-free
show examples
.

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task response
Consider adding more detailed examples to support your points. This will enhance the depth of your argument and demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your paragraphs better to ensure smooth transitions between ideas. This will help the reader follow your line of thought more easily.
task response
Try to develop each argument more fully before moving on to the next point. This will provide a more comprehensive discussion of each view.
coherence cohesion
The introduction presents a clear position and outlines the two viewpoints to be discussed, which is a good start to the essay.
task achievement
There is an attempt to balance both sides of the argument, which shows an understanding of the task requirements.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • homogenization
  • globalization
  • cultural identity
  • streamline
  • standardization
  • economic benefits
  • international community
  • cultural exchange
  • predictability
  • authentic experiences
  • proliferation
  • branding
  • tourism appeal
  • consumer comfort
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