People who decide on a career path early in their lives and keep to it are more likely to have a satisfying working life than those who change jobs frequently.To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
There is an opinion that a
career
path Use synonyms
that is
decided early offers Linking Words
individuals'
Change noun form
individuals
satisfying
working Correct article usage
a satisfying
lives
than Use synonyms
chaning
jobs frequently. I personally strongly agree with Correct your spelling
changing
this
assertion since Linking Words
people
can live a stable life if they decide on a Use synonyms
career
path early in their Use synonyms
lives
.
Use synonyms
To begin
with, I firmly believe that valuing their Linking Words
career
paths early has a positive effect on Use synonyms
people
's quality of Use synonyms
Use synonyms
lives
. Fix the agreement mistake
life
Firstly
, Linking Words
people
can live stable Use synonyms
lives
because it is likely that they work Use synonyms
as
a higher hierarchy. To explain, if individuals pursue Change preposition
in
career
paths that they want to get a job, they early would learn subjects that are necessary for them to work, which means that they quickly can work in the field where they would like to get a job. Use synonyms
Therefore
, when they become Linking Words
matural
adults, not only do individuals locate a high working position Correct your spelling
mature
natural
buy
they Correct your spelling
but
also
Linking Words
would
earn a large number of money, which they can live comfortably Verb problem
apply
their
later Change preposition
in their
lives
.
On top of that, if Use synonyms
people
change their jobs frequently, it is likely to suffer from stress. Use synonyms
For example
, they should learn a new working method, Linking Words
informations
and subjects if they quit their job and change their Change the wording
information
pieces of information
career
, which makes them get stressed through Use synonyms
this
and Linking Words
therefore
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
damged
their mental health Correct your spelling
damages
such
as insomnia, anxiety and depression because they might not earn regular income. Linking Words
However
, if Linking Words
people
keep their Use synonyms
works
, they may not feel fear Fix the agreement mistake
work
to
not Change preposition
of
earn
regular profits and it is easy to adapt their Wrong verb form
earning
career
because they learn and study information and majors that they want value.
In conclusion, I Use synonyms
competely
argue that keeping their Correct your spelling
completely
career
early exerts a positive impact on living stable Use synonyms
lives
and earning a large amount of money.Use synonyms
Submitted by garim4645 on
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task achievement
Consider integrating a more balanced analysis by discussing potential advantages of frequently changing jobs, such as gaining diverse experiences.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the organization slightly by ensuring each paragraph clearly supports a specific aspect, such as financial stability or stress impacts, to maintain clarity.
task achievement
Include more specific examples or personal experiences to strengthen arguments and provide real-world context.
introduction
Your introduction effectively states your opinion and sets the stage for the discussion.
logical structure
The essay logically progresses from the introduction through supporting paragraphs to the conclusion, providing a clear argument.
coherence
Good use of linking phrases and transition words to connect ideas smoothly.