IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can the government do to reduce the amount of waste produced?

#rubbish #government #amount #waste
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These days, the negative trend
that is
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 really popular among societies is that populations produce a number of trash every day and its rate increases over a period of time.
This
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 essay discusses the main reasons and how the government can solve
this
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 matter. Today, commercial and technology convert global inhabitants into a throwaway society. Populations are converted to consumerism owing to the fact that social media advertises new fashions and gadgets.
Thereafter
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, people are encouraged to buy the newest clothes and devices;
additionally
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, their houses do not have a lot of space for a collection of their old items, so they throw out them.
In addition
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, every day, companies produce extraordinary electronic gadgets for the community that improve the quality of lifestyles;
therefore
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, they buy new ones and retire the old tools. The fact
that is
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 really crucial for solving
this
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 matter is that authorities have to persuade their population to separate their rubbish inasmuch as
this
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 strategy aids governments to recycle the waste really well with high efficiency and manufacture other goods.
Moreover
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, if the public does not obey
this
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 rule , they have to get a lot of fines.
Furthermore
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, they have to create a new law that businesses should generate devices that can update and people do not need to change their gadgets to have access to the new technology.
To sum up
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,
this
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 obstacle is a result of publicities that affect the community's thinking and upgrade the technology items every time.
However
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, its solution is the authorities because they can encourage their society members to alter their throwing-out methods and change associations' products to sustainable ones.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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task response
While your essay provides a comprehensive response, consider adding more specific, real-world examples to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to maintain a cohesive flow of ideas.
task response
Consider further detailing your main points to improve the clarity and depth of your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the problem and previews the main points of discussion.
task response
You have addressed both parts of the prompt, discussing causes and potential government solutions effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the essay’s main ideas and reinforces the central argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Consumerism
  • Mass production
  • Packaging
  • Recycling
  • Waste management
  • Electronic waste
  • Planned obsolescence
  • Single-use products
  • Regulations
  • Incentivizing
  • Deposit-return schemes
  • Educational campaigns
  • Sustainable practices
  • Fines and penalties
  • Waste-to-energy technologies
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