IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today.

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The plans illustrate the changes that
has
Change the verb form
have

The singular verb has does not appear to agree with the plural subject the changes. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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 been made to the Porth Harbour from 2000 until today.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the area has undergone
a
Remove the article
apply

The indefinite article, a, may be redundant when used with the uncountable noun development in your sentence. Consider removing it.

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significant development with new tourist facilities
have been
Wrong verb form
being

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb have been. Consider changing it.

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 added and the enlargement of the dock space. Prior to the development, there was only one dock for passenger ferries with a small-sized marina for private yachts to the west from it. Fishing boats were placed in a larger bay to the south
from
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 the marina. Interestingly, following development, these two have been relocated with each other, and an additional dock was built next to the existing one. It is worth noticing that there were
incorporated
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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some major changes in the southern part mainly for tourists. Today they can visit coastal cafes and shops which were constructed between the marina and a lifeboat, and using
extended
Correct article usage
an extended

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 part of the road easily get to the hotel which has replaced
previously
Correct article usage
the previously

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 disused castle in the very same place.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the nearby private beach is now exclusively open for
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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hotel guests,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 it was a public place in 2000. Upon taking a look at the west side of the plans,
it is clear that
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 the northern car park has remained the same, the much larger southern one has changed its initial entrance road. Unlike in 2000 now it doesn't have
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 direct connection with the main road. An additional building containing showers and toilets has been constructed near the car parks.

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introduction conclusion
The introduction effectively sets the context for the essay. Ensure clarity and specificity regarding changes to avoid confusion. Consider crafting a clear conclusion to summarize the harbor's development.
logical structure
Some parts could be confusing due to slightly complex sentence constructions. Try simplifying sentences and explicitly linking ideas for improved logical structure.
supported main points
The essay successfully describes the changes made, employing relevant specific examples that are detailed and contextually appropriate.
logical structure
Maintains a coherent structure with adequately linked paragraphs and evenly distributed details about both the original and current state of the harbor.
complete response
Covers the necessary aspects of the task by elaborating on key changes and developments in the harbor area, meeting the requirements of task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • multi-purpose building
  • recreational facilities
  • maritime safety
  • leisure destination
  • tourism-focused
  • infrastructure improvements
  • pedestrian promenade
  • landmark
  • expanded roads
  • transport infrastructure
  • industrial use
  • cruise ship terminal
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