Some people think that government should spend money on railways. Others believe that there should be more investment into new roads. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

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There is no denying the fact
tht
Correct your spelling
that
the
transborts
Correct your spelling
transports
have a big impact on the
way
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
live, and there is a commonly held
believe
Replace the word
belief
show examples
that nations
Add a missing verb
are requier
show examples
requier
Correct your spelling
require
required
to maintain the
money
Use synonyms
and spend it on
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
things
such
Linking Words
as
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
roural
Correct your spelling
rural
roads
Use synonyms
,
as well as
Linking Words
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
is how
argue
Add the particle
to argue
show examples
this
Linking Words
idea. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will express my own opinion and discuss
this
Linking Words
question
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
end. On the one hand,
railwayes
Correct your spelling
railways
railway
could improve our transportation in
Correct article usage
an alternitive
show examples
alternitive
Correct your spelling
alternative
way
Use synonyms
.
such
Linking Words
as
transoprt
Correct your spelling
transport
accumualtion
Correct your spelling
accumulation
individuals
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
place
Correct pronoun usage
one place
show examples
to another place, the benefit
fomr
Correct your spelling
of
this
Linking Words
have a
siginificant
Correct your spelling
significant
seve
Correct your spelling
save
money
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
who do not have enough cash to buy a car or garage to keep it,
Moreover
Linking Words
, railways have a crucial role in motivating
people
Use synonyms
to use
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
transportation, In
additon
Correct your spelling
addition
, the
money
Use synonyms
will go towards government and reuse to provide many facilities to improve cities and the break
roads
Use synonyms
as long as and so on.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
people
Use synonyms
considers
Change the verb form
consider
show examples
that the
money
Use synonyms
theat
Correct your spelling
the
governments invested in the railways should be invested
to build
Change preposition
into building
show examples
new
roads
Use synonyms
,
therefore
Linking Words
,
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
the
roads
Use synonyms
may
can growth
Verb problem
improve
show examples
the
way
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
live.
In other words
Linking Words
,
Governments
Fix the agreement mistake
Government
show examples
investment in
roads
Use synonyms
significantly
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
trafic
Correct your spelling
traffic
jams and and
develping
Correct your spelling
develops
the
way
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
move to schools and employees to
thier
Correct your spelling
their
jobs. In
conlusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, I believe railways can be a butter
shoice
Correct your spelling
choice
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
Use synonyms
how
Correct word choice
who
show examples
did
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
not have much time to drive and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
need to provide suitable
roads
Use synonyms
for movement
espcially
Correct your spelling
especially
for business and
farastructer
Correct your spelling
far stricter
.
Submitted by hassan.alhayek11 on

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coherence cohesion
The introduction is clear but could be more concise in presenting the topic. Aim for a direct statement of the discussion rather than a broad start.
coherence cohesion
Work on using clear paragraphing. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or point. This will improve the logical flow and structure.
task achievement
Proofread for spelling and grammatical errors. Errors such as 'transborts' and 'alternitive' may distract from your main points.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to strengthen your arguments, especially in the paragraphs discussing the benefits of railways and roads.
task achievement
You effectively discussed both sides of the issue, which shows a good understanding of the task. This fulfills the requirement to discuss both views.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion clearly states your opinion and summarizes the essay, which is strong for coherence and task completion.
coherence cohesion
You attempted to use linking words such as 'moreover' and 'in addition,' which helps improve the flow of ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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