The best way to provide road safety is to introduce more serious punishments for drivers. Do you agree or disagree?

There is a view that harsher punishments are the most effective way to ensure

road

Use synonyms

safety. I disagree with

this

Linking Words

opinion for two key reasons. One method that can potentially have more impact than introducing serious punishments is providing

drivers

Use synonyms

with regular education.

Such

Linking Words

training programs allow

drivers

Use synonyms

to constantly update their driving skills. In the majority of countries, the skills of

drivers

Use synonyms

are tested only once before they obtain their driver’s license. Naturally, over time people may slowly lose their ability to operate a vehicle skillfully, which can result in devastating consequences.

This

Linking Words

can be prevented, if the government provides

drivers

Use synonyms

with training on a regular basis, emphasizing defensive driving and the importance of following

traffic

Use synonyms

laws. Apart from updating the skills of

drivers

Use synonyms

, education should

also

Linking Words

focus on pedestrians. In some cases, an accident occurs not because of the driver, but the pedestrian because of jaywalking, using mobile phones, and ignoring

traffic

Use synonyms

signs. Another effective approach is to improve infrastructure design. Creating roads with clear markings, proper signage, and smooth surfaces can prevent accidents.

For example

Linking Words

, roundabouts can reduce the severity of collisions compared to traditional intersections.

Moreover

Linking Words

, designating safe zones for pedestrians and cyclists can contribute to safer roads because cyclists usually have to share the

road

Use synonyms

with motorized vehicles or with pedestrians, which increases the chances of accidents. A

further

Linking Words

change to our current

road

Use synonyms

infrastructure, which can improve

road

Use synonyms

safety, is to implement smart

traffic

Use synonyms

signal systems. These systems respond to

traffic

Use synonyms

flow and reduce congestion and the chances of accidents. In conclusion, there are more effective ways to achieve

road

Use synonyms

safety than imposing stricter punishments on

drivers

Use synonyms

, including driver training programs and enhancing

road

Use synonyms

infrastructure.

mesney.2008Tue Jan 28 2025

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task achievement

Consider elaborating on how education could be systematically implemented for both drivers and pedestrians to make your argument even stronger.

task achievement

Try to provide more statistical evidence or real-world examples to support your points, especially in terms of education effectiveness and infrastructure impacts.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that all supporting points tie back clearly to the central argument of disagreeing with harsher punishments for drivers.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion.

coherence cohesion

The arguments presented are logical and well-organized, making it easy to follow the line of reasoning.

task achievement

The essay provides a comprehensive response to the task, addressing alternative ways to ensure road safety rather than just focusing on punishment.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

deterrent
traffic violations
penalties
license suspensions
safety courses
public education campaigns
infrastructure
technological advancements
enforcing laws
holistic approach

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The best way to provide road safety is to introduce more serious punishments for drivers. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some movies are serious, designed to make the audience think. Other movies are designed primarily to amuse and entertain. Which type of movie do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.