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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Sompe poeple believe that bicycles are the best mode of transport in the cities, while others disgaree. Discuss advantages and disadvantages of both views and give your own opinion.

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In the modern era, transportation plays a crucial role in daily life, and many people argue that
bicycles
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 are an efficient mode of commuting,
while
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 others disagree.
This
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 essay will explore both the advantages and disadvantages of using
bicycles
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,
along with
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 my personal perspective. Proponents of cycling believe that it offers numerous benefits, particularly for the environment and personal
health
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.
Firstly
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,
bicycles
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 are eco-friendly as they help reduce pollution, traffic congestion, and carbon emissions, contributing to a healthier ecosystem.
Additionally
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, cycling promotes a better quality of life by encouraging physical activity. In today’s world, where many people suffer from lifestyle-related
health
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 issues, riding a bicycle can be an effective way to stay fit. A report by the World
Health
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 Organization states that nearly 90% of individuals who regularly commute by bicycle experience improved cardiovascular
health
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 compared to those who rely on other modes of transportation.
On the other hand
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, critics argue that
bicycles
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 are not always practical, especially in urban areas. One major drawback is that cycling takes significantly more time than cars or motorcycles, making it less convenient for those with busy schedules.
Moreover
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, safety is a concern, as
bicycles
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 lack protective features
such
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 as airbags and seatbelts, increasing the risk of injury in accidents. Another limitation is the impact of weather conditions; unlike cars,
bicycles
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 do not provide shelter, making travel uncomfortable in extreme heat, rain, or cold weather. In conclusion,
while
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 cycling offers significant
health
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 and environmental benefits, it may not always be the most practical option, particularly in cities where time efficiency and safety are priorities.
Therefore
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,
although
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bicycles
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 are a valuable mode of transport, they should be complemented by other means of commuting depending on individual needs and circumstances.

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task achievement
Your essay effectively explores both views on the topic. You provide a clear discussion of the advantages and disadvantages of using bicycles as a mode of transport. However, consider expanding on the examples provided to further enhance the depth of your analysis.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is quite strong, with a clear introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion. To improve, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, reinforcing the overall flow of your argument.
task achievement
You have made a good effort in supporting your main points with relevant examples. For an even higher score, try to incorporate a few more specific examples or data points to strengthen your arguments further.
structure
Your introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion, outlining the main points you will cover. This is an effective way to engage the reader from the outset.
content
You presented a balanced view of the advantages and disadvantages, which shows critical thinking and fair assessment of the topic.
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