If a product is good and it meets people’s needs, people will buy it. So advertising is unnecessary and is no more than a form of entertainment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued that
people
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could choose their essential requirements without any advertising.
Hence
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, they believe that there is no need
a
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for a
show examples
marketing strategy for products
otherwise
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purchasing
a
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apply
show examples
stuff turns to enjoy shape. In
this
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essay, I will give reasons and examples for why I disagree with
this
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statement.
Firstly
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, I will discuss the benefits
effects
Correct word choice
and effects
show examples
of advertising on
people
Use synonyms
and
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secondly
Add a comma
secondly,
show examples
I will consider how
bringing
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to bring
show examples
gains to
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
.
To begin
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with, I feel that it is important to give true advertisement and
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
show examples
necessarily
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necessary
show examples
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
to
people
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. It seems clear
to
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that
show examples
focusing
to
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on
show examples
target
Add an article
the target
a target
show examples
audience is crucial.
For example
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, if a person or depletory wants a chicken to cook in the evening,
market
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the market
show examples
should give reasons why
people
Use synonyms
buy it or make
a campaigns
Correct the article-noun agreement
campaigns
a campaign
show examples
such
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as discounts or reductions.
In addition
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,
Add an article
the seller
a seller
show examples
seller
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sellers
show examples
should
has
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have
show examples
knowing
personel
Correct your spelling
personnel
at
market
Add an article
the market
show examples
and they can express to consumers
with
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apply
show examples
fertilizing
informations
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information
pieces of information
show examples
about chicken.
Furthermore
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, in our modern times, there are
great
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a great
the great
show examples
number of digital marketing areas. Vendors
also
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may present their products in their applications
such
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as
hepsiburada
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Hepsiburada
show examples
,
getir
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gear
get
or
trendyol
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Trendyol
show examples
for society’s demands and might enhance brand awareness.
Additionally
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, there are many earnings for not only
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
but
also
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government
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the government
show examples
. First of all, for
people
Use synonyms
, it can
be generated
Wrong verb form
generate
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
plenty of job opportunities with
advertisement
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advertisements
show examples
. If
people
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can learn and improve themselves
about
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in
show examples
this
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field, they conquer both
self-confident
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self-confidence
show examples
and self-money.
For instance
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, the more buyer purchases fruits, the more
merchandiser
Correct article usage
the merchandiser
show examples
earns and contributes to the country’s economy thanks to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advertising.
Moreover
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,
bazaar
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bazaars
show examples
should
definetely
Correct your spelling
definitely
be present by displaying on their website, because they
also
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can get more payment
due to
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click-through-rate
Correct your spelling
click-through rate
show examples
or pay-per-click with their yields if
autroized
Correct your spelling
authorized
give
permisson
Correct your spelling
permission
to seller’s presentation their products via
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. In conclusion,
people
Use synonyms
might buy their needs only with their viewpoints,
therefore
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it
is not appear
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does not appear
show examples
to
signifacant
Correct your spelling
significantly
significant
the publicizing. I strongly disagree
that
Change preposition
with that
show examples
because
people
Use synonyms
far
easily
Correct quantifier usage
more easily
show examples
obtain their goods
due to
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advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
. As
result
Add an article
a result
show examples
of
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apply
show examples
, both society and
officer
Fix the agreement mistake
officers
show examples
will be won.

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coherence and cohesion
Work on your introduction and conclusion to ensure they clearly state your position and summarize your main points effectively.
task achievement
Make sure each paragraph stays on topic and presents a clear main point supported by relevant examples.
coherence and cohesion
Revise phrases for clarity and accuracy. Avoid phrases like 'give true advertisement' and instead say 'ensure accurate advertising'.
task achievement
You provide relevant points about the benefits of advertising both for consumers and the economy.
coherence and cohesion
You attempt to structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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