Q1. Nowadays,many people have to work longer hours and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their life easier.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the 21st
century
Add a comma
century,
show examples
most folks have to stay at
work
Use synonyms
for more
hours
Use synonyms
than they should . The reasons for
this
Linking Words
new trend
along with
Linking Words
suggestions about what
corporates
Replace the word
corporations
show examples
can do to help their employees feel less stressed and have a better life will be elaborated on in the present essay. First of all, in recent decades individuals have
to
Add a missing verb
had to
show examples
work
Use synonyms
hard for long
hours
Use synonyms
each day which has several reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, household expenditure rises in comparison with two decades before, so most people have to
work
Use synonyms
more in order to earn more money which can put them under more stress.
Secondly
Linking Words
, during the present
century
Add a comma
century,
show examples
communities confront lots of
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
issues
such
Linking Words
as Inflation and Recession which play a significant role in corporate policy about working
hours
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, almost
societies
Correct determiner usage
all societies
show examples
are fascinated by luxurious cars, travel and products which make them
work
Use synonyms
more than before in order to buy a better car on go on a travel.
For example
Linking Words
, research has shown that nowadays families spend more on leisure in comparison to a few decades ago.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, several steps could be
done
Verb problem
taken
show examples
by an employer to facilitate his employee's life. One of the main steps which can be
done
Verb problem
taken
show examples
is increasing the salary which can certainly lead to a better life for those working for them.
In addition
Linking Words
, they can recruit more people, so they can share the duties,
Linking Words
consequently
Add a comma
consequently,
show examples
It leads to less
work
Use synonyms
time per
each
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
person.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
the individuals who
work
Use synonyms
in a
corporate
Replace the word
corporation
show examples
feel more satisfied with their job, they will be more beneficial to the company and working efficiency will increase. In conclusion, being under stress by working more
hours
Use synonyms
which is widespread has lots of reasons . Company owners can take several steps to tackle
this
Linking Words
problem which have been elaborated on in the present essay.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction
Try to make your introduction more engaging by briefly stating the impact of long working hours on people’s lives, instead of just stating what will be discussed.
conclusion
Improve the conclusion by summarizing the main points more clearly instead of referring back to the essay. It should reflect the arguments made.
support
Provide more specific examples or data to support your points on the reasons for longer working hours and how employers can help.
grammar
Ensure to consistently use proper punctuation and spacing for clearer readability in your writing, especially around conjunctions.
content
You have presented clear reasons and some effective solutions regarding the issue of working hours, which shows a solid understanding of the topic.
structure
The essay has a clear structure with separate paragraphs for different points, which helps in understanding your argument progression.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • increased competition
  • technological advancements
  • blurring the lines
  • economic pressures
  • organizational culture
  • job insecurity
  • work-life balance
  • flexible working hours
  • mental health support
  • counseling services
  • stress management
  • recognize and reward
  • boost morale
  • workplace conditions
  • ergonomic
  • physical and mental strain
  • encourage delegation
  • distribute workload
  • prevent burnout
  • supportive work environment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: