Some people think it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that girls and boys benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss these two views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Some
people
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assert that educational institutions should offer distinctive schools based on student's
gender
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,
whereas
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others contend that combining both
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gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
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at
school
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is more beneficial for young learners.
This
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essay will discuss both perspectives and will conclude with a personal opinion. First and foremost, one compelling argument supporting the former notion is that the number of interactions with another
gender
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can decrease, leading to greater concentration on academic study at
school
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. To clarify, as young
people
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grow older, they tend to pay attention to fashion and appearance to make a partner, which can be a significant distraction
for
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from
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their learning.
For instance
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, in
japan
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Japan
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, some private schools have managed
the
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in the
show examples
same way, since the primary objective for
school
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is to enhance
student's
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students'
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adacemic
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academic
performance.
Moreover
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, in fact, graduates from
such
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establishments tend to enrol in prestigious universities,
such
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as
the
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apply
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Tokyo
university
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University
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.
Therefore
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,
this
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approach can contribute to educational outcomes effectively.
On the other hand
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, one major advantage of the latter notion is that the policy can foster inclusiveness from an early age. To illustrate, interacting with diverse individuals can offer opportunities to gain
a
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apply
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valuable insight into an inclusive society
,
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apply
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since young
people
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are able to recognize
gender
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gaps
at
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in
show examples
educational settings, which is essential knowledge after graduation. Specifically, even though young
people
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spend time with
the
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their
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same sex
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same-sex
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peers during
school
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years, they have to collaborate and commit to their responsibilities with others in the workplace.
Therefore
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, fostering collaborative behaviours and teamwork skills with other genders during
school
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periods is advantageous for their workplaces. In conclusion,
while
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separating
female
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females
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and
male
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males
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at
school
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can play a pivotal role in enhancing their academic performances, combined classes with both
female
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females
show examples
and
male
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males
show examples
are advantageous after graduation, considering interpersonal skills with other
people
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. In my opinion, the latter
take
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takes
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precendence
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precedence
over the former notion since, nowadays, society
have
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has
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been becoming more interconnected.
Therefore
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, developing interpersonal skills would benefit individuals in
a
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the
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long run.

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coherence and cohesion
Consider providing clearer transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay.
task achievement
Reinforce your main points with more explicit examples or data to support your arguments further.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states the topic and your intention to discuss both sides, which sets a clear path for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
The essay does a good job of presenting arguments from both perspectives, showcasing a balanced view before concluding with your opinion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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