Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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These days
technology
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is increasingly being utilized to monitor individuals
such
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as what they are saying and doing. I personally believe that
while
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this
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improvement of
technology
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hinders the privacy and freedom of
people
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, the benefits of it outweigh the drawbacks because it helps to prevent crime. If
technology
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is used to monitor what
people
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are saying and doing, it affects the privacy of
people
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. If
people
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are always monitored, they cannot do their tasks
according to
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their wishes.
Moreover
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,
technology
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affects the freedom of
people
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. Because of the fear of being monitored, they cannot independently express their thoughts, ideas and opinions.
For example
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, in Bangladesh,
people
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cannot express their political opinions on social media because their posts are saved by
technology
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, and
therefore
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, if there is any
sansational
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sensational
comment, they
suppose
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are supposed
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to clarify their opinions
according to
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the Digital Act Law.
However
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, I believe that if effective use of
technology
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can be ensured, it will bring benefits.

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task achievement
Try to provide a more balanced argument by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages more thoroughly in separate paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly, which can enhance the flow of your essay.
task achievement
You have clearly stated your opinion in the introduction, which helps the reader understand your stance on the issue.
task achievement
Your example from Bangladesh effectively illustrates your point about the limitations on freedom resulting from monitoring technology.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • surveillance
  • invasion of privacy
  • security
  • monitoring systems
  • misuse
  • criminal activities
  • productivity
  • psychological impact
  • data protection
  • workplace policies
What to do next:
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