IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The diagram illustrates the process that is used to manufacture bricks for the building industry

The diagram illustrates the process that is used to manufacture bricks for the building industry
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nuclear weapons are
threat
Add an article
a threat
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
world peace as they pose significant risks. Meanwhile, nuclear
powers
Fix the agreement mistake
power
show examples
 are cheap and clean
energy
Use synonyms
options
Fix the agreement mistake
option
show examples
. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and believe that nuclear power can be an alternative option.
However
Linking Words
, its adverse impacts cannot be underestimated.
This
Linking Words
 essay will delve deeper and give my perspective. Nowadays, the world is under threat since finite resources are contributing negatively to the ecosystem. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
substantial
Change the article
a substantial
the substantial
show examples
 number of consequences that the world faces
such
Linking Words
 as air contamination, industrial fumes, carbon footprint and many
.
Correct quantifier usage
more.
show examples
 By investing in nuclear
energy
Use synonyms
, authorities can reduce these detrimental effects.
For instance
Linking Words
, investments in renewable resources namely solar
energy
Use synonyms
, wind power etc., require costly implementations. It
also
Linking Words
 takes a lot of effort to maintain its utilization. If not cleaned regularly, it can lose its function.
However
Linking Words
, nuclear power is more approachable and needs only little or no effort. Making it a lot more beneficial and efficient. The innovation of nuclear weapons revolutionized the way countries interact.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, they have the potential to come with irreversible results. Nations see these as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dominance
Replace the word
dominant
show examples
 for each other, using it as a political threat.
In addition
Linking Words
, even a small explosion can be catastrophic for the
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, decades ago, a nuclear central exploded and not only harmed the environment but it
also
Linking Words
 affected communities. Its disruption led to deaths in humans, animal and its radioactive effects
also
Linking Words
 caused toxins in the soil. In conclusion, despite its harmful potential usage and negative impacts, if used properly it can be a great alternative rather than using limited
energy
Use synonyms
 sources. In my perspective, a shift to nuclear
energy
Use synonyms
 can shape biodiversity and the environment positively and governments must implement stricter regulations about its reliance.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, for instance, however".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • diagram
  • manufacture
  • bricks
  • building industry
  • process
  • dig
  • prepare
  • clay
  • mold
  • shape
  • dry
  • fire
  • kiln
  • cool
  • package
  • fired
  • overview
  • importance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: