IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

1. Some say that todays life is better than it will be in the future; others disagree and say that in the future life will be better than now. Discuss, and include your own opinion

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Few
people
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 argue that present
life
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 is better than the
life
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 of upcoming years as they believe that
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future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 is unpredictable,
while
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 others favour that
life
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 in the upcoming time will be far better
due to
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 technological advancements.
This
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 essay intends to analyse both perspectives,
however
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, I opine that present
life
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 is more enjoyable than the
future
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. On the one hand, proponents of having a better present
life
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 argue that the
future
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 is unpredictable and
people
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 should enjoy
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the things or relatives they are living with
instead
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 of thinking about the upcoming time.
For instance
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, students are enjoying their studies or working towards accomplishing their career goals,
although
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 they are unsure whether they will achieve it or not.
Similarly
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,
people
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 who are working or maintaining their work-
life
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 balance are utilising their valuable time to create unforgettable memories with their family members or colleagues.
On the other hand
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, the advancement of technology is continuously pushing
people
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 towards having a better
life
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 in the
future
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. The spread of technology in every area of
life
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 is making
people
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 more dependent on technological advancements either at work or at the office. The development of several electronic household appliances
are
Change the verb form
is
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 assisting individuals in finishing their tasks.
Moreover
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,
people
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 who are dreaming about achieving their goals are
also
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 favouring
of
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apply
show examples
having a better
future
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life
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 as once they attain their goals, they will have more financial stability and security in their
life
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.
Consequently
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,
people
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 are favouring having a healthier and better
life
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 in the coming times.
To sum up
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,
although
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people
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 are relying more on technology
for having
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to have
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 a better
life
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 in the upcoming years and on their
hard-work
Correct your spelling
hard work
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,
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
I opine that
people
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 should enjoy their present
life
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 regardless of thinking about the
future
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.

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task achievement
Strengthen the introduction by clearly stating your thesis and providing a brief preview of the points you will discuss.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that supporting details are relevant and well-developed. Consider adding more specific examples.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas and to guide the reader through your arguments. This will enhance coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Consider rephrasing some sentences for clarity and precision, as some ideas could be expressed more effectively.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion that is maintained throughout the text, showing your understanding of both perspectives.
task achievement
You have effectively highlighted the importance of enjoying the present and the impact of technology on future life.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancements
  • automation
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • medical breakthroughs
  • quality of life
  • environmental challenges
  • climate change
  • resource depletion
  • global connectivity
  • cultural understanding
  • global problems
  • international cooperation
  • political instability
  • optimism
  • inequality
What to do next:
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