IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Most
people
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 think that social networking sites influence
to
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apply
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people
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 and individuals negatively. In
this
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essay
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essay,
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 I will explain why I totally agree with
this
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 and I will give
explanation
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an explanation
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to
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as to
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 why it is bad for
people
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. First of all, social
media
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 has some benefits and
much
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many
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 more disadvantages in our lives.
For instance
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, with the help of the
internet
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internet,
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 we can use it to improve our
life
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lives
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 and educate children. It may be helpful for parents and children’s future. But social
media
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also
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 has many disadvantages which make our lives more
difficulty
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difficult
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.
For example
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, many
people
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 are addicted to mobile
phone
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phones
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 and social networks because they spend a lot of time on the internet and scroll through their social
media
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 profiles.
This
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 harmful habit affects
people
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’s productivity and thinking. They start comparing themselves with other
people
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 on social
media
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 and try to become the same. 108
On the other hand
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, social
media
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 is full
plenty
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of plenty
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 of scammers, who use it to scam
people
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 and steal their data and money.
This
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 increases doubts in society because humans are used to storing their personal information online. And rising numbers of scammers make them feel more unsafe.
In addition
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, social
media
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 may become the cause of increasing some health issues. In conclusion, I gave some explanation
why
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of why
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 social
media
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 has a huge impact on
people
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, their
behavior
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behaviour
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 and
lives
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their lives
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. And why we should control posting content and our private information on social platforms in order to protect us from scammers on the internet.

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task achievement
Provide clearer examples and elaboration on points made, especially in relation to the overall argument about the negative effects of social media.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow by better linking your ideas, ensuring each paragraph clearly relates back to your main argument.
task achievement
You have a clear stance on the issue which is articulated in the introduction.
task achievement
You have identified relevant points that reflect common concerns about social media usage.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social isolation
  • virtual interactions
  • mental health
  • feelings of inadequacy
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • misinformation
  • destabilize
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • productivity
  • foster connections
  • educational content
  • social activism
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