there is a problem related to the changing room of your gym in your community.you reported it several times, but it was not solved

Dear Manager, I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter to you to draw your attention to the issues in the gym’s changing room. These problems are making it difficult for members to use the facilities

First,

Linking Words

the showers are in very poor condition—some do not have enough pressure.Some leak continuously.

This

Linking Words

not only wastes water but

also

Linking Words

makes

floor

Add an article

the floor

show examples

slippery and unsafe.

Second,

Linking Words

many lockers are broken in

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

cases people's

personalbelongings

Correct your spelling

personal belongings

may be lost.

Lastly

Linking Words

, the ventilation in the changing room does not work

good

Change the word

well

show examples

,causing

disgusting

Correct article usage

a disgusting

show examples

smell that makes the space uncomfortable to use. I have reported these issues several times to the head of

neighborhood

Correct article usage

the neighborhood

show examples

and he always assured me that the problems would be fixed soon. I kindly request you to take immediate action. Please let us know when these issues will be fixed Thank you for your time and attention.

Your

Correct pronoun usage

Yours

show examples

truly,Shaxruza

uluga2002

Feb 11, 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Ensure a smoother flow by connecting sentences and ideas more cohesively. For example, use linking phrases to explain how one issue leads to another.

task achievement

Expand a bit more on how the issues affect gym members. Providing some personal insights could enhance the emotional appeal of your letter.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to proofread for minor grammatical errors and typos; for instance, 'personal belongings' and 'not work well' should be corrected for clarity.

task achievement

The letter clearly states the purpose, which is to report issues in the changing room of the gym.

task achievement

You have outlined specific problems, which shows a clear understanding of the issues at hand in the gym facilities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

143 words

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there is a problem related to the changing room of your gym in your community.you reported it several times, but it was not solved

Fully explain your ideas

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?

Governments in many countries are urgently seeking ways to reduce unemployment in rural areas. What are the most effective ways to do this? Which measure do you think would be the single most effective step that governments could take?

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?

Some people say it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?