"Prevention is better than cure " Researching and treating disease is too costly so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. To what extend do yo agree?

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Prevention
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is definitely better than
cure
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. But
both
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researching, treating
disease
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and investing in preventative
measure
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measures
show examples
are
both
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important in terms of applying
both
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technical knowledge and
meaures
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measures
in real life. The cost of these applied sciences should not be
factor
Add an article
a factor
the factor
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determining their
importane
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importance
and needs. For
socities
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societies
nowadays, preventative
measures
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have to be
further
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promoted and applied as they get lower awareness and attention from the public. But
this
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should not be a reason to stop researching and treating
disease
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. Here are a few reasons why I think preventative
measure
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measures
show examples
should be more widespread and treating
disease
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should be kept going
on
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apply
show examples
. First of all, taking preventative
measures
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can be more well-managed than sudden
attack
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attacks
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of
disease
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. Taking Hong Kong as an
exaxmple
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example
, the public
hosipitals
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hospitals
are always full and crowded. If you get
a flu
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the flu
flu
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, a waiting
time
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Change preposition
of approximates
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approximates
Replace the word
approximately
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to
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apply
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6 to 9 hours is required for a proper, funded
cure
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in public hospitals.
This
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not only makes
patients
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wait for a long
time
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without
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cure
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a cure
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, which potentially worsens the case, but
also
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result
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results
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in a very large demand
of
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for
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labour and capital for
further
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management of
patients
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in hospitals.
This
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is a lose-lose situation where
both
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the
organisations
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, including government and private ones, and
also
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the
patients
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do not get any benefits. But if citizens are encouraged to take
prevention
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measures
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of
disease
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earlier, the problem can be solved. For clinical
organisations
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nowadays, online booking systems are well-developed. People can plan their
time
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for treatments like body-checking. These clinical
organisations
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can
also
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arrange and manage their schedule so that the venue will not be crowded, and the number of
case
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cases
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that
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in
show examples
the
Correct pronoun usage
which
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patients
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are required to wait for a long
time
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without
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cure
Add an article
a cure
show examples
is decreased.
Therefore
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, taking
prevention
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measures
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instead
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of looking for
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cure
Correct article usage
a cure
show examples
after getting sick is definitely a beneficial solution to
both
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patients
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and
clincil
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clinical
clinic
organisations
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.
Secondly
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, there are
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disease
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diseases
show examples
that can not be cured after clear symptoms are found, which can be only solved by
prevention
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. Nowadays,
government
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governments
show examples
from many different countries are working on
promotion
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the promotion
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of annual body checking
to
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for
show examples
citizens. The main reason why is that there is
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disease
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a disease
show examples
like cancer.
This
Linking Words
kind of
disease
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has no significant symptoms at the early stages, which is the best
time
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for a complete
cure
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. After symptoms appear
on
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in
show examples
patients
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significantly, they have reached the late stages that may not be curable, or else with a higher risk of death during surgeries. The only method and solution to lower the possibility of having these cases is to do body checking, as a
prevention
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of letting these
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disease
Change the determiner
diseases
show examples
appear. In a nutshell, the above reasons show that preventative methods are actually extremely important for people nowadays. But as in the
above mentioned
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above-mentioned
show examples
examples, we can see that researching and treating
disease
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are
also
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equally important as
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disease
Add an article
the disease
a disease
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can be
sudden
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a sudden
show examples
accident. To reduce the harm of
accident
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accidents
show examples
, we should learn to prevent
it
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them
show examples
and
also
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learn the
method
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methods
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to
cure
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the damage
it
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they
show examples
brings
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bring
show examples
. Applying it
into
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to
show examples
preventing and curing
disease
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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is the same. Even if there are
prevention
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measures
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which find
out
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apply
show examples
patients
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who have cancer at early stages, precise
cure
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and treatment of cancers is still needed.
Therefore
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,
instead
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of considering
costs
Correct article usage
the costs
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of investment and comparing that of
both
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preventative
measures
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and treating
disease
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, considering
lives
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the lives
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of humans should be the main focus as lives
worth
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are worth
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more than money. I do not try to claim that these actions should be done at all
cost
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costs
show examples
.
But
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However
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it is not a factor for comparing the importance of preventative
measures
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and treating
disease
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.

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task achievement
Clarify your thesis statement in the introduction to make your position clearer. For example, explicitly state how much you agree with the statement about prevention being better than cure.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure to proofread your essay for minor spelling and grammatical errors (e.g., 'meaures' should be 'measures', 'exaxmple' should be 'example', 'hosipitals' should be 'hospitals'). These do not significantly impact comprehension, but they can detract from the overall impression.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between paragraphs by using more linking words or phrases. This will help the reader better follow your argumentation and improve the overall coherence of your essay.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples, such as the case of Hong Kong's public hospitals and the importance of body-checking, which helps support your arguments effectively.
task achievement
Your essay touches upon important aspects of both prevention and treatment of diseases, demonstrating a balanced perspective on the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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