Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Gia Linh.

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In recent years, there has been a debate over the most effective ways to reduce
crime
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.
While
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some individuals admit that putting people in jail for an extended time is the best solution, others believe that alternative methods should be considered. The two aforementioned views will be discussed thoroughly before presenting my personal perspective in the conclusion. On the one hand, giving longer prison sentences to criminals could work wonders in the battle against
crime
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.
Firstly
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,
this
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method would act as a deterrent since it may discourage dwellers from breaking the law. Knowing they would serve a long prison sentence, those who have the idea of committing a
crime
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would think carefully and realize that it would not be worth the risk.
Furthermore
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, a longer time in jail may help rehabilitate offenders.
This
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is because they have more time to think about what they have done and feel guilty for their wrong behaviour.
Therefore
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, when being released, they would be afraid of engaging in activities that could lead to criminality.
On the other hand
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, other alternatives are
also
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essential to reducing the
crime
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rate. The first measure is for authorities to hold more seminars that educate citizens on legal knowledge. These programs would help residents realize how risky breaking the law is and could raise people’s awareness. Another good step is for the government to install more cameras and have more policemen patrolling the streets.
This
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could prevent petty criminals like shoplifters and pickpockets, as they are less likely to operate when being watched.
Lastly
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, ensuring that the prisoners who are released have stable jobs when they are free is a great prevention plan. When they are able to support themselves and their family, they have no reason to turn back to
crime
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. In conclusion,
although
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letting people serve long prison sentences can be a great contributor to preventing
crime
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, I am of the opinion that other effective measures
also
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need to be executed simultaneously.

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task achievement
Elaborate slightly more on why alternative methods are important, possibly mentioning societal benefits or rehabilitation aspects.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking phrases to ensure smooth transitions between points, which could enhance clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Well-structured paragraphs with clear topic sentences and logical development of ideas.
task achievement
Balanced presentation of arguments from both viewpoints before expressing a personal opinion in the conclusion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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