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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people think that schools should reward students with the best academic results, while others believe it is more important to reward students who show improvements. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It has been undoubtedly an argument in institutions regarding who should be awarded either the ideal grades or hard work to succeed in class.
Thus
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, I believe that a balance between both is obligatory to boost learner's confidence.
To begin
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 with, On the one hand, a reward system should be implemented in every school to motivate young children if they are scoring better than before. There should be extra tuition arranged in the establishment in order to look after the weak points of that particular subject or weekly assignments
for instance
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, extra projects should be assigned to the ones who are facing issues in the study so that with practice they would do better. By analysing, their holistic development as compared to past performance, appreciation plays a crucial role in enhancing weaker children to do better in the following exams.
Secondly
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, the opposition claims that only toppers deserve the prices. People tend to think that by observing the
overall
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 academic achievements, there should be award functions organised to celebrate and dedicate the hard work of the best candidates which not only helps to boost their energy but
also
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 encourages others to reach that point to gain some fame and respect from teachers and parents and to grab higher opportunities in future for work.
To conclude
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, no doubt rewarding improved performance can be proven beneficial but motivating others who scored well is
also
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 mandatory to show the others to achieve desired goals.
Therefore
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, appreciating both parties with little incentive is extremely important.

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coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines the two opposing views before stating your own opinion. This will help set the context for the discussion.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points, especially in relation to the rewards for both high achievers and those showing improvement.
coherence and cohesion
In the conclusion, reiterate your main arguments to reinforce your stance and provide a stronger closure to the essay.
task achievement
Your engagement with the topic is evident, and you present both sides of the argument, which is a positive aspect of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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