Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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A fraction of people believe that kids and teenagers must be required to have

full-time

Correct article usage

a full-time

show examples

education until they are at least 18. They think It's a vital notion to keep them

focus

Wrong verb form

focused

show examples

on their study plans. I argue

this

Linking Words

idea. In

this

Linking Words

essay, we will discuss

this

Linking Words

topic.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the general concept

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

demonstrates that raising the total hours of school is a common point of view from many

researcher

Change to a plural noun

researchers

show examples

. At the same time, it is not a suitable suggestion for many families. Because it is an exaggeration

Change preposition

show examples

their kids.

In addition

Linking Words

, it will

make

Verb problem

have

show examples

a negative effect on their minds.

For example

Linking Words

, A Japanese school decided that the new education program

became

Wrong verb form

would be

show examples

17 hours Every day.

As a result

Linking Words

, the student"s percentages diminished by about 25%.

Overall

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

experience indicates

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the failure of

this

Linking Words

idea.

Moreover

Linking Words

, several countries are trying to support young people to spend their free time to gain a new ability or more study hours.

In contrast

Linking Words

, it's essential to avoid feeling bored

due

Change preposition

show examples

these times.

In other words

Linking Words

, make the study process enjoyable to get more benefits.

For instance

Linking Words

Many

Fix capitalization

many

show examples

cities provided the technology

Change preposition

for

show examples

their future goals

such

Linking Words

as learning

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the VR invention to simulate several jobs.

Then

Linking Words

, it will change students" vision about the education.

To sum up

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

idea has numerous risks

Change preposition

for

show examples

kids and teenagers. It"

Correct your spelling

difficult to reach the hopeful targets. A bad effect on their brains is the primary

causes

Fix the agreement mistake

cause

show examples

to cancel

this

Linking Words

option.

kalmah.sa20Thu Feb 13 2025

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task achievement

Try to clearly state your position in the introduction and ensure it aligns with the conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Enhance the logical structure by breaking ideas into clear paragraphs and ensuring smooth transitions between them.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to proofread your work to correct grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and punctuation.

task achievement

You provided specific examples that demonstrate the potential downsides of extensive education hours.

coherence and cohesion

You introduced the topic well and gave some valid points regarding education perspectives.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

fundamental cornerstone
literacy and numeracy
social inequalities
foundation of knowledge
social mobility
informed and engaged citizenry
democratic processes
youth crime rates
productive activities
vocational training
workforce
stifling individual talent
economic contribution
stress and mental health issues
unsuitable educational system
one-size-fits-all approach
diverse talents
career paths
formal academic education
financial strains
low-income countries
improving quality of education

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Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Environmental damage is a problem in most countries. What is the cause of this damage? What should be done about this problem?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?