IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people claim that public transport should be free of charge and others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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It is true in the present era, No
one
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 can deny the importance of
transportation
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.From
this
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 perspective, the are some nations believe that public vehicles could be without fun,
while
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 others think they must be charged.
This
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 essay will delve into both views and give related examples and opinions. On
one
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 hand, individuals who are claiming about the offering of unfunded
transportation
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 see,that
this
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 is
one
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 of their rights as citizens.
Thus
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,some countries are offering
this
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 service to their nations.
For example
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, Canadians use free-chargeing buses as I read in The Magazine recently.
In addition
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, there are some elderly and disabled from the community who need to move to a variety of destinations .So they must give
this
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 paid facilities. Frequently, cooperation among members is achieved. On the other opposing view,there are some causes.The most significant
one
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 the government would reduce the income gained from the sector of
transportation
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 eventually leading to a low economy.
Additionally
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, the occupation of driving can disappear or become lower than before because the service will be more than before. A report by UNESCO survey showed that 75 % of people depend on taxis to acquire money,as a sequence, a charge of
transportation
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 eliminated
this
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 job in the
last
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 decade. In conclusion,
although
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 the are two different opposing proposals about paying or not for all members, I totally agree with the first
one
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 because of the positive impacts which lead to prosperity and happiness among community members.
Therefore
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, the outcomes are not limited to individuals only but
also
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 have a profound impact on the community.

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task achievement
Consider refining your thesis statement to clearly state your opinion about public transport costs at the end of your introduction. This will help guide the reader throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs clearly relate to the main points being discussed. For example, make sure each paragraph begins with a topic sentence that introduces the main idea, and ensure that supporting sentences are directly connected to that idea.
coherence and cohesion
Review grammatical structures and vocabulary. There are several inaccuracies that could be improved for clarity and professionalism, such as 'unfunded transportation' instead of 'fun,' and ensure that proper forms of words are used (e.g. 'charged' instead of 'charging'). This will enhance the overall quality of your essay.
content
You have provided a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument. This approach is essential in argumentative essays and shows an understanding of different perspectives.
content
Your use of examples adds credibility to your argument, particularly mentioning the Canadian free transport system and the report from UNESCO. Such references can strengthen your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • accessibility
  • social equity
  • overcrowding
  • operational costs
  • fiscal burden
  • subsidies
  • public health
  • congestion
  • urban planning
  • revenue
  • taxpayers
  • mobility
  • psychological effects
  • quality of service
What to do next:
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