IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that schools should choose students according to their academic abilities, while others think it is better to have students of different abilities studying together. Discuss both views and state your own opinion?

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On
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This
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this
Linking Words
 given topic will discuss regarding students' academic achievement and other skills
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
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 be discussed
for
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with
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 school authorities. From my
experience
Add a comma
experience,
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 I would like to express
about
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apply
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my opinion in two ways. One of them is about
student
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a student
the student
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 who studies hard
Correct word choice
and try
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try
Add the particle
try to
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 get
Add an article
a
the
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high
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
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on
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in
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 their study. There are the following positive aspects to these
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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students'
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of students'
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 change. They care
themselves
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for themselves
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 well and have
a
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apply
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good time management. The students who are good at art, physical training
so
Correct word choice
and so
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 on these ones
vasting
Correct your spelling
wasting
 their time on academic
stydies
Correct your spelling
studies
such
Linking Words
 as mathematics, literature and Language learning.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Clarify your introduction to clearly state the topic and your opinion. A strong introduction sets the stage for the argument you're making.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow between your points. Use linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments. For example, use 'First,' 'In addition,' or 'However.'
Task Achievement
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your arguments are supported with specific examples or explanations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider including a conclusion that summarizes your points and reinforces your opinion. A conclusion helps to round off your essay effectively.
Task Achievement
You have attempted to present both sides of the argument, which is good for task response.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic abilities
  • learning outcomes
  • collaborate
  • instruction
  • tailor
  • gifted students
  • advanced material
  • thrive
  • diversity
  • social skills
  • empathy
  • peer tutoring
  • encouragement
  • collaborative learning
  • self-esteem
  • retention rates
  • inclusive atmosphere
  • holistic approach
  • intelligence
  • ability
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