IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

When we meet someone for the first time,we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this good thing or a bad thing?

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Nowadays,when
people
Use synonyms
 meet any
person
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 for the very
first
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 time
then
Linking Words
 they decide
is
Correct word choice
if is
show examples
 it a good
person
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 or bad.The given statement
is illustrating
Wrong verb form
illustrates
show examples
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
the
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 phenomenon that some
people
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 think quickly to meet a new
person
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 because of their good
personality
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 but others see a good sense of humour.I will discuss both views and
also
Linking Words
 forthcoming paragraphs will clear my point of view.
First
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 and foremost,sometimes when we talk to a stranger,observe their body language and their
personality
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 but some are well-organised so everyone is impressed by their
first
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 appearance.
For example
Linking Words
,all over the world when a company hire an employee,they focus on the
first
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 impression even
the
Correct word choice
if the
show examples
person
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 does not have anything special.Later,they realise that the
person
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 is not good at their job but only
maintain
Correct subject-verb agreement
maintains
show examples
 their dressing and fitness which
attract
Correct subject-verb agreement
attracts
show examples
 every single individual.Because of
this
Linking Words
,companies have many rules to deal with
such
Linking Words
people
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,some folks have good sense but do not express their abilities which could bring them many benefits in their
up coming
Correct your spelling
upcoming
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 life.Unfortunately,we ignore those who do not maintain their
personality
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,
however
Linking Words
,if we give them a chance to prove themselves,we might achieve our goals.
Therefore
Linking Words
, should consider all qualities not just the
first
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 impression
even
Rephrase
apply
show examples
.
To conclude
Linking Words
,we should give opportunity to those who struggle to express their vast idea and should not focus only
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personality
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on personality
show examples
.Sometimes
people
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 have both things a good
personality
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 and a clever mind which help them and contribute to the world.

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task achievement
Your introduction could be clearer by more explicitly stating your opinion on whether quick judgments are good or bad. This will help guide the reader's expectations for the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Consider using more linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your ideas. This will improve the coherence of your arguments across paragraphs.
task achievement
When providing examples, try to ensure they are clearly explained and directly related to the point you are making. This will strengthen your argument and make it easier for the reader to follow.
task achievement
You demonstrate an understanding of the complexity of first impressions by discussing both sides of the argument, which is a strong point in your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your thoughts and suggests a balanced perspective, which is commendable.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • first impression
  • initial judgment
  • stereotypes
  • assess
  • non-verbal cues
  • body language
  • appearance
  • facade
  • misjudgments
  • unfair judgments
  • decision-making process
  • social situation
  • character
  • repeated interactions
  • open-mindedness
What to do next:
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