IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Explain some of the ways in which humans are damaging the environment. What can governments do to address these problems? What can individual people do?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that human activities have a serious impact on the
environment
Use synonyms
. So
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments and individuals are responsible for protecting the
environment
Use synonyms
. Several
problems
Use synonyms
 have resulted from
this
Linking Words
 tendency and they should be tackled by a number of effective solutions from authorities and
people
Use synonyms
. There are several reasons for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
pollution
Use synonyms
. The principal issue is that
people
Use synonyms
 directly discharge chemical waste into rivers without using treatment systems leading to thousands of deaths of aquatic animals. Dead fish, crabs,
sea gulls
Correct your spelling
seagulls
show examples
, dolphins, and many other animals often drift away onto the coastlines, killed by pollutants in their habitat. Humans are severely affected by water
pollution
Use synonyms
. Get diseases
such
Linking Words
 as cancer, heart attack and various other diseases by eating seafood that has been poisoned. Another problem is that gas emissions from industrial and
exhausted
Replace the word
exhaust
show examples
 fumes from vehicles commuting on the streets cause
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
.
Air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 is a significant risk factor for a number of
Use synonyms
pollution - related
Correct your spelling
pollution-related
show examples
 diseases, including stroke and lung cancer.
Air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 has reduced crop yields in the most affected areas. These
problems
Use synonyms
 cause a massive loss of human lives and property. Since
such
Linking Words
 issues are serious, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments and individuals should take steps immediately to deal with these
problems
Use synonyms
. One step forward belonging to the
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
 is to enact laws to reduce
carbon
Add an article
the carbon
show examples
 footprint or encourage companies to use renewable energy, impose a heavy fine on those who litter on the street or discharge waste without using treatment systems. Another solution is that
people
Use synonyms
 should use eco-friendly vehicles
instead
Linking Words
 of cars or other means of transport that release exhausted fumes into the atmosphere, to reduce seriously polluted
air
Use synonyms
 quality.
People
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 adopt products made from disposal materials
instead
Linking Words
 of using plastic bags
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and participate in local
Use synonyms
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 campaigns to raise
people
Use synonyms
’s awareness. In conclusion, there are various negative consequences of damaging the
environment
Use synonyms
 and appropriate steps need to be taken to tackle these
problems
Use synonyms
, not only by the government but
also
Linking Words
 by individuals.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While your ideas are generally clear, try to strengthen your arguments with more specific examples or statistics to enhance your points.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Consider using linking words to improve the overall cohesion of your essay.
task achievement
Your introduction provides a clear overview of the topic and identifies the key issues.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reinforces the importance of both government and individual actions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pollution: contamination, emissions, pollutants, industrial waste
  • Deforestation: habitat loss, biodiversity, urban development, logging
  • Climate Change: greenhouse gases, global warming, fossil fuels, renewable energy
  • Overfishing: unsustainable, fish stocks, marine ecosystems, conservation
  • Waste Production: non-biodegradable, plastics, recycling, waste management systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays: