Some people think modern technology is making people more sociable while others think that real life interaction is better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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These days, people have various perspectives on socialization. A group of them think that new technology is the best way to socialize

while

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others believe that real communication is the best choice. I subscribe to the first idea owing to the fact that technology creates a chance for global inhabitants to interact with each other and improve their knowledge. On the one hand, the fact

that is

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really important is that the Internet, the main tool of globalization, aids populations to interact with other people.

As a result

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, they are more sociable and have access to a range of data about how they have to behave with the community who have various cultures .

For example

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, Nowadays, social media like Telegram, Instagram, and so on provide an opportunity for the population who live in one village in Africa to interact with individuals who live in London, the capital city of England.

On the other hand

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, when communities have communication with humans physically, they can work in real workplaces in several places better.

In other words

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, when populations just interact with other ones on platforms, their over-reliance, and interpersonal skills are not improved.

For instance

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, real interaction aids people to enhance their social behaviour and not blush when they want to do a range of work like buying devices and so on in various situations. To summarise, modern technology creates a chance for international citizens who live in various areas like rural regions or cities have communicate with each other and it helps globalization.

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, real interaction is the best option that aids communities to improve their social behaviour.

To conclude

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, In my personal view, the new channels are the best item for becoming sociable because you can speak with various nationalities.

maryamkazemi968Sun Feb 16 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Work on providing more balanced views in each paragraph. Make sure that both sides are presented with equal depth and detail.

task achievement

Enhance your introduction by clearly outlining the main points that will be discussed in your essay. This helps guide the reader's expectations.

task achievement

Add more specific examples to support your claims. For instance, you could mention how technology has enabled international cooperation or friendships that wouldn't have been possible otherwise.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear stance, which is a strong point as it makes your argument more persuasive.

coherence and cohesion

You’ve included relevant points about the impact of technology and face-to-face interaction, which shows an understanding of the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

geographical barriers
platforms
social media
video calls
instant messaging
distraction
face-to-face communication
accessibility
inclusivity
personal touch
non-verbal cues
body language
digital communication
cultural exchange
global networking
over-reliance
interpersonal skills
meaningful conversations

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Some people think modern technology is making people more sociable while others think that real life interaction is better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In many Western countries there is an increasing number of couples choosing to have no children for study what are the advantages and disadvantages to couples having no children?

Some people think that the main purpose of school is to turn children as good citizens and workers, rather to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people today are worried about the large quantities of waste produced by ordinary households. What problems are caused by household waste, and what solutions may be possible in both the short and the long term?

Consumers are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them?