IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Is is sometimes said people should be encouraged to get married before the age of 30 as it is best for society. do u agree or disagree?

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Getting married early has recently become more popular in our lives.
Use synonyms
people
Capitalize word
People
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 have different
view
Fix the agreement mistake
views
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 regarding
this
Linking Words
 topic . In my point of view I struggle don'
t
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 agree with the statement mentioned above for different reasons. To
being
Verb problem
begin
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 with,my main reason is
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
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money.
personally
Capitalize word
Personally
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,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 believe that some
people
Use synonyms
 don'
t
Use synonyms
 have
the
Remove the article
apply
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enough money to get married before 30
age
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 because may get
lower
Add an article
a lower
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 salary.
For example
Linking Words
,
some
Change preposition
in some
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 jobs in the world their salary is weak, so they need more time to allocate money.
In addition
Linking Words
 , another reason is that preparation.In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
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 I
thank
Correct your spelling
think
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 that some
people
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 don'
t
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 want to get married because they see the time isn'
t
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 sustainable for that .
For instance
Linking Words
, some of them want to enjoy
in
Change preposition
apply
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their lives.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
married
Replace the word
marriage
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 is not associated with
age
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 only. To illustrate , some
people
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 don'
t
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 feel comfortable with
this
Linking Words
 idea because maybe they
liked
Wrong verb form
like
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 their
live
Replace the word
life
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 now. In conclusion,I totally disagree with the statement that says, should get married before the
age
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30
Change preposition
of 30
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 for the reasons mentioned above .
Therefore
Linking Words
 , I recommend
people
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to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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find
the
Correct article usage
a
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 sustainable time for
married
Replace the word
marriage
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 not
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age
Use synonyms
.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Try to improve sentence structure and clarity in your writing. Some sentences are a bit confusing and could be clearer.
Task Achievement
Make sure to expand on your ideas and provide a more comprehensive explanation for your points. For instance, why do some people want to enjoy life rather than marry?
Task Achievement
Your introduction presents a clear opinion and sets up the discussion well, which is a great start!

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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