In many countries, there is a growing concern about the quality of education. What are the reasons behind this issue, and what measures can be taken to improve the education system?

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These days, there are some arguments about the quality of education. It is thought by some people that the quality is getting degraded. In

this

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essay, I am going to find out the reasons behind

this

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issue and how can we improve it.

To begin

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with, there are some factors that are deeply rooted in education

such

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Correct article usage

the satisfactory

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satisfactory

Replace the word

satisfaction

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of students,

Correct word choice

and abilities

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abilities

Fix the agreement mistake

ability

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to teach. Nowadays, with the advancement of

the

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apply

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technology, many schools use electronic devices

Linking Words

while

Change preposition

during

show examples

classes.

Due to

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the dependence towards

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technology

such

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as AIs,

teachers

Use synonyms

' ability to teach is getting worse.

Also

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, poor treatment towards

teachers

Use synonyms

is one of the problems which is leading them to choose another occupation like a professional tutor or an instructor in private courses. In terms of solutions to improve

this

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problem, it is important to appreciate

teachers

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. It is

also

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possible to say that several

teachers

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are not receiving the admiration and respect they deserve.

And

Correct word choice

Furthermore

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furthermore

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teachers

Use synonyms

should strengthen their skills to satisfy students' learning experiences. From my experience, I could tell that

teachers

Use synonyms

who can make children

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

concentrate only teach with textbooks and their voices. Those who are not dependent

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show examples

technology

teaches

Change the verb form

teach

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well because they constantly communicate with the kids during the class and it makes the bond between them a lot stronger. In conclusion, there are many causes for the decrease in the quality of the education system. It is

also

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true that several actions and solutions can be made to resolve

this

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issue.

Such

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Remove the comma

apply

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better treatment for

teachers

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so that they can interact more with students.

In addition

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, training explanations and communication skills can set the tone for a better learning experience.

ihjung2000Tue Feb 18 2025

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task achievement

Include more specific examples to support your points and strengthen your arguments.

coherence and cohesion

Use more varied linking words and phrases to enhance the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Clarify certain statements for better understanding, especially when mentioning technology and teaching methods.

content

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that summarizes the main points.

content

There are identifiable main points addressing both reasons behind the issue and proposed solutions.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

standardized testing
holistic learning
underfunding
resources
overcrowded classrooms
teacher salaries
curriculum
socioeconomic disparities
unequal access
professional development
educators
teaching practices
innovations
modern workplaces
advancements in technology

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In many countries, there is a growing concern about the quality of education. What are the reasons behind this issue, and what measures can be taken to improve the education system?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance, for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is important for children to learn what is right and what is wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn the distinction. To what extent do you agree? What sort of punsihment should be given?

the most important aim of science should be to improve people's live. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries, people are now living Lon than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

Plastic bags,plastic bottles and plastic packing are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do to the environment? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?