IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people argue that
professionals
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as doctors and engineers, should be obligated to work in the country where they were trained,
while
Linking Words
 others believe they should have the freedom to work wherever they choose. Both perspectives have valid arguments, which I will discuss before presenting my own opinion. On one hand, requiring
professionals
Use synonyms
 to stay in their training country ensures that the nation benefits from the investment made in their education. Many governments subsidize medical and engineering education, meaning taxpayers contribute to their training. If these
professionals
Use synonyms
 leave for better opportunities abroad, it could result in a "brain drain," where the country suffers from a shortage of skilled workers.
This
Linking Words
 is particularly concerning in developing countries, where healthcare and infrastructure depend on trained specialists.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
professionals
Use synonyms
 should not be restricted in their career choices. Everyone has the right to seek better opportunities, higher wages, or improved quality of life. Countries with better facilities and research opportunities attract skilled workers, allowing them to grow in their careers and contribute more to their
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, globalization promotes the exchange of knowledge and expertise, benefiting both the individuals and the countries they serve. In my opinion,
while
Linking Words
 governments can encourage
professionals
Use synonyms
 to stay, they should not apply restrictions.
Instead
Linking Words
, they should create better working conditions and incentives,
such
Linking Words
 as competitive salaries and improved infrastructure, to retain talent.
Professionals
Use synonyms
 should have the freedom to work where they feel most valued and fulfilled.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider adding specific examples or case studies to illustrate your points about brain drain and the impact of globalization. This will enhance your argument and provide clearer context for your claims.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence, consider using more varied linking words and phrases to connect your ideas within paragraphs and between them. This could enhance the flow of your argument.
task achievement
Your essay presents a balanced view, discussing both sides of the argument effectively, which demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and your intention to discuss both views, setting a good foundation for your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: