Some people think that children benefit from the TV and they should spend much time on it, but others support that children should not watch TV. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Television
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became
most
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the most
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important channel for delivering
informations
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information
pieces of information
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.
Television
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offers
programs
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that could
be serve
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serve
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as learning channels for
children
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.
However
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, some
TV
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programs
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also
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have negative influences
for
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on
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children
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.
This
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essay will explain
about
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apply
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the positive and negative impact of watching
television
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for
children
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. Some
TV
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programs
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have educational
programs
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that target
children
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as the audience.
This
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kind of
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programs
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program
show examples
are
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is
show examples
good for
children
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.
Moreover
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,
children
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can get
the
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apply
show examples
updated information through
TV
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.
For example
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, by watching
television
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,
children
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can learn about
food
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the food
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chain through
animal related
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animal-related
show examples
programs
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. On the other side,
television
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is associated with the increase
of
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in
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crime incidence among
children
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.
This
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problem appears because several
television
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programs
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are not appropriate for
children
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. Some
programs
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contain violent activities or
adult related
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adult-related
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behaviours which have
bad
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a bad
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influence
for
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on
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children
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. A study showed that the longer duration of
children
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watch
TV
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, they tend to have more violent behaviours.
Furthermore
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,
TV
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also
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create
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creates
show examples
a kind of addiction for
children
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.
As a result
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,
children
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do not like to socialize with their friends in real life. In the long run, it will
affected
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affect
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the
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their
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personal and social
skill
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skills
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when they
are getting
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get
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older. In conclusion,
television
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for
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is for
show examples
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children
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children's
show examples
development. To minimize the bad impact of
TV
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, parents should supervise the
programs
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watched by their
children
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as well
set
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as set
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the maximum hours they can watch
TV
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.

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic. This will help frame your essay and guide the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Combine sentences to improve the flow of ideas. For example, link your reasons for children benefiting from TV more directly to their learning experiences.
task achievement
When discussing the negative impacts, you could improve your argument by including more detailed examples or explaining the studies you refer to for enhanced credibility.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument effectively, which is crucial for a balanced discussion.
task achievement
Your points are generally relevant and demonstrate a good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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