IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer

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Dear sir, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to
complaine
Correct your spelling
complain
 about the situation
at
Change preposition
in
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our
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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room no.15 second floor , I am a student and I live with another student her name is Fatima I have no
complain
Replace the word
complaints
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on
Change preposition
about
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 her personally she
have
Change the verb form
has
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 been great but lately she
have
Change the verb form
has
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 been
invite
Change the verb form
inviting
invited
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 her family to live with us for a couple of weeks , and I have
tow
Correct your spelling
two
show examples
 final projects and tests. The thing that it has been
effect
Change the verb form
effecting
effected
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 me in a bad way because I can't focus with them being around, especially her
tow
Correct your spelling
two
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 little sisters they play most of the time in the living room, which
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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 a lot of noise,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 told her that I can't focus but her mom is sick and have to take care of them and
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 can not blame her honestly. So without
a
Correct article usage
apply
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further
Linking Words
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
do, I would much prefer to move out
at
Change preposition
to
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 the next room, I heard from a friend of mine that it is going to be empty next Monday , so if there is any chance that you could move me there it would be wonderful and so helpful. Looking forward to
hear
Change the verb form
hearing
show examples
 from you Best regards Hala Abdullah

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Task Achievement
Make sure to proofread your letter for spelling and grammatical errors, such as 'complaine' and 'tow'.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of your ideas by organizing your letter into clear paragraphs. Consider separating the description of the situation from the problems it causes.
Task Achievement
Make your request even clearer by specifying how you would like to proceed with the potential move.
Task Achievement
You expressed your situation and feelings clearly, which is important in a letter.
Suitable Writing Tone
You maintained a polite tone throughout your letter, which is commendable.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • accommodation officer
  • roommate
  • share a room
  • living arrangement
  • difficult to work
  • noise levels
  • study environment
  • privacy concerns
  • alternative accommodation
  • single room
  • academic performance
  • well-being
  • respectfully request
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