Some people consider that teachers should focus on academics more than motivating students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no denying the fact that
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
academics
Fix the agreement mistake
academic
show examples
level is essential for teachers.
Linking Words
While it
Correct word choice
It
show examples
is a commonly held belief that individuals
thinking
Wrong verb form
think
show examples
that instructors must
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
focus on academics more than
Use synonyms
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
motivation
Use synonyms
. there is
also
Linking Words
an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the student's
motivation
Use synonyms
is a charge for enhancing the learning skills.
To begin
Linking Words
with, there is a
strength
Replace the word
strong
show examples
relationship connected between them.
In other words
Linking Words
,
motivited
Correct your spelling
motivated
students
Use synonyms
they are learning
repidly
Correct your spelling
rapidly
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there is a huge effect
whether
Change preposition
on whether
show examples
the
Use synonyms
students
Add a verb
students are
students were
show examples
more effective.
For example
Linking Words
, if you want
teaching
Change the verb form
to teach
show examples
in primary school you must
saving
Change the verb form
save
be saving
show examples
the
motivation
Use synonyms
of the
students
Use synonyms
high
Rephrase
as high
show examples
as possible. Another point to consider,
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
high marks,
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
powering
Wrong verb form
powered
show examples
by
motivation
Use synonyms
. It is
also
Linking Words
possible to say that, more
motivation
Use synonyms
conclude
Change the verb form
concludes
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
getting higher marks and well doing in the exams.
In addition
Linking Words
, ..
For instance
Linking Words
, In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
motiving
Verb problem
motivating
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
for studying
Change preposition
to study
show examples
more is
a
Change the article
the
show examples
largest force for getting
grater
Correct your spelling
greater
show examples
in the educational
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Language/Grammar
Improve sentence structure and grammar to enhance clarity and professionalism. For example, replace 'motivited' with 'motivated' and rephrase 'to getting greater in the educational environment.'
Content/Examples
Provide more specific examples and details that directly support your main points about the role of motivation in education. For instance, referencing studies or statistics could strengthen your argument.
Structure/Clarity
Ensure that your main ideas are clearly stated in the introduction and that you summarize your points succinctly in the conclusion. A stronger thesis statement would guide the reader through your argument more effectively.
Opinion/Argumentation
You have a clear opinion on the topic, which is a strong aspect of your response.
Content/Argument
You make a valid point about the relationship between motivation and academic performance, which is relevant to the question.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: