IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The table and charts beow give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.

The table and charts beow give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed.
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The table displays the information about the police budget by
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 2017 and 2018 in one aspect of the UK. The pie chart displays
money
Use synonyms
 used in the workers’ salaries,
technology
Use synonyms
 and building construction and transportation.
Overall
Linking Words
,
table
Add an article
the table
show examples
 shows that
money
Use synonyms
collected
Add a missing verb
was collected
show examples
 from four different
source
Change to a plural noun
sources
show examples
,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
which saw a slight increase from 2017 to 2018. The chart shows
money
Use synonyms
 distributed
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 three items
while
Linking Words
spend
Change the verb form
spending
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
 was much
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
show examples
 the
last
Linking Words
 year. Police officer budget
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 2017 to 2018, the notable change was in local taxes in 2017 with 91.2 European dollars to 102.3 dollars in 2018. The second ranked increased from the national government with 175.5m in 2017 which increased 2.8m to 177.8m by 2018. Other sources
were
Verb problem
had
show examples
 the least increase with 0.5m from 38m in 2017 to 38.5 in 2018. In 2017 giving
money
Use synonyms
 to the workers had nearly three quarters of the
overall
Linking Words
 share and
this
Linking Words
 is set to decrease 6% of the total in 2018. In 2017 spent
money
Use synonyms
 on
technology
Use synonyms
 increased 6% from 8% to 14%. Despite
Use synonyms
money
Add an article
the money
show examples
 spent
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
technology
Use synonyms
 increased, the next biggest
Use synonyms
money distributed
Add a hyphen
money-distributed
show examples
 item was building and transport with 17%
while
Linking Words
 it remained unchanged in 2018.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words money, technology, m with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "displays" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 6 times.
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