Nowadays, many people communicate using social media and the Internet on a daily basis. However, this led to an increase in online attacks and cyberbullying. What are some of the reasons why people take part in cyberbullying? What are the effects on children and teenagers who are victims of cyberbullying? - at least 250 words. - spend around 40 minutes.

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One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is that many individuals are starting to use social

media

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and the

internet

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for communication every day,

while

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others consider that persons could receive online attacks and cyberbullying. It is undeniable that communication via the

Internet

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has become an essential part of life.

This

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essay will discuss both these points of view and argue in favour of the former. A commonly held belief is that using social

media

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and the

internet

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to maintain communication. As evidence, they point to enhance their relationship and to be in touch.

Furthermore

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, more

teenagers

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use the

internet

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and obtain benefits data for future life.

This

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could be explained by the fact that there are many humans on social

media

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who assist in improving their lives and

attain

Wrong verb form

attaining

show examples

knowledge from social

media

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As a result

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, it leads to the

internet

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not only for conveying but

also

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its opportunities to change their life.

On the other hand

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, some people claim that

teenagers

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often face cyberbullying

while

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using the

internet

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For example

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, they may mention that a child person when posting photos on social

media

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starts to attain more negative comments

due to

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many people may envy of them. It will impact on their mental health.

In addition

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, social

media

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has detrimental effects on youngsters. The explanation lies in the fact that some

teenagers

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start cyberbullying because they think that will not accept punishment. Studies show that 65% of young people struggle with cyberbullying and the government set new rules for cyberbullying.

Therefore

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, frequent use of social

media

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may lead to terrible consequences. In conclusion, many children and

teenagers

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are receiving social attacks from their peers.

However

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, I believe that it will cease in the future.

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Task Achievement

The introduction could be clearer about the specific points that will be discussed in the essay.

Task Achievement

More detailed examples of cyberbullying and its effects would strengthen your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Consider using connecting words and phrases more effectively to enhance the flow between ideas and paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your conclusion could be expanded to summarize the key points made in the essay more effectively.

Task Achievement

The essay addresses the topic well and presents both sides of the argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

There is a clear attempt to organize ideas into paragraphs, which aids in readability.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Air transport is increasingly used to transport fruit and vegetables to other countries where they cannot be grown or are out of season. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

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Some people think that the goverment should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as it is a limited resource , while others it should not be regulated. Discuss both the sides and give your opinion

Your next door neighbour owns a small dog that barks throughout the day and the night. Write a letter to your neighbour requesting that something be done about the dog. Include in your letter: • Your reason for writing • What you would like to happen • A nice, respectful style.